Dear Diary
This is going to be the longest that I've probably written.
I guess I do not have much time left Kookie. You might be asking why I'm not getting better, or why am I not recovering at all.
Don't worry, I'm here to answer all those questions that you have in mind. Let me start with something light before we go into the worst part. Also, I'm writing this thinking that you will get your hands on this little book when I'm not around anymore.
My love, my soulmate, my one and only, and my life. You have no idea, how important you are to me, and sometimes it doesn't even make sense as well. I can't give you the reason why you are so important to me, but I can tell you it's because you are all that I have.
Let me start with Dr. Min, as you might be asking who is this Dr. Min that I'm addressing all over in my entry every day, well, maybe not every day, but still.
Dr. Min is my psychiatrist. Why in the world am I seeing a mental doctor? I started to have depression and anxiety when I found out that you are having an affair, my love. But I really don't blame you, I never will.
It's totally normal for a couple like us to fall out of love, and I get that Jungkook. If you find your happiness elsewhere, I get it, and I'm happy for you. Well, my depression and anxiety might not be because of you entirely, it's probably here even before I met you.
You know when I met you on that faithful day, when you saved me from the bullies, I felt safe in your arms, and I saw myself in the reflection in your soft brown eyes. No one had ever made me feel that safe. At least no one before you and after ahbuji and halmoni. But sadly they passed. Since then, I have always kept to myself, and the more I was called the weird one, the silent one, the fat and ugly one, the more I kept to myself, I don't even hope for a change or a savior. Until you.
Maybe I was always pessimistic. Good things that happen to me don't last long.
When I discovered that you are having an affair, my world crumbled. It literally crashed onto me, my love. Don't get me wrong please, I'm not angry nor am I hating or blaming you at all. I don't. In fact, I love you so much that I'm willing to let you go and be happy my love.
I guess I was too broken, and the god decided to play with me for a bit more, and this is where Dr. Kim comes in. I was on a show, and you were away for a trip. I started to have nosebleed episodes, and I was diagnosed with leukemia.
There is no cure at the moment my love. This is why I'm not recovering, and I might be leaving you sooner than I would've expected.
Kookie-ah, I love you. I really do.
I can tell you are changing, and I appreciate the effort. But, not gonna lie, it's all too late. I'm not saying you are bad or what, but we might have just lost our battle with the time and my sickness.
Again, I love you, and there is nothing that would change that.
I'm thankful, that you are with me for all these years, being my friend, then my boyfriend, then my husband, to the father of our little baby.
Take care, my love!
Forever Yours,
- PJM
PS :-
Thank you to you too Dr. Min, and Dr. Kim.
Thank you for being there for me, and making me feel like I'm not all alone.
***************
Author's Notes :Now, I can either end this here, or... Vote Here for more chapter ->Here for "This is enough" ->
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Dear Diary || Jikook ||
FanfictionJimin, you have less than a year as per our latest diagnosis, would you want to discuss this with Mr. Jeon? No, Doctor Kim. He doesn't need to know about this, he is happy with his life at this stage, so I will just keep this for myself. Jimin-ah...
