Beyond - Nate Jacobs

28. "I love you, Nate"

!Trigger warning!

Mila's POV

I gasped and kind of jumped when I heard the clicking sound, quickly turning around.

Don't ask me why I knew what this sound was coming from, but I knew, it was the sound of a gun.

When I turned around I saw none other person but Nate Jacobs sitting in my chair, in the dark, with a fucking gun.

"What are you doing here?", I asked calmly not wanting to anger the guy with the gun.

"Don't worry, I'm not here to apologize", he answered making me gulp, "Can you imagine, me sitting here with a gun. Forcing you to accept my apology?"

I took a slight step backward, I knew Nate could be violent but a gun? That was new and it scared the living shit out of me.

Was he here because he found out about Fez and I? Was he here to fucking kill me?

Dear God, I know I have been a cunt in a lot of moments but please, don't make me die tonight.

"You're scaring me", I finally choked out.

"Yeah, that's kind of the point", he muttered before he got out of the chair he was still sitting in, and walked over to me.

I followed his steps with my eyes, not daring to leave him out of my sight. He placed his hand softly on my hip, the feeling of his hand scared me, and yet, it felt natural.

"I love you", I whispered before he turned me around and walked us over to my bed, "I love you, Nate. I love you".

He made us sit down on my bed, face to face. The gun was still pointed at me, laying by my hip.

"I know you better, than anyone in this world. I humiliated you, but that's over", he whispered while looking deeply into my eyes.

I didn't dare to speak a word not wanting to anger him. He got up from the bed and walked over to my nightstand, lifting up the necklace he had given me for my birthday.

I couldn't breathe normally, my heart was pounding so loud, that I was scared he could hear it.

"Why do you think my dad likes to film himself fucking?", Nate asked breaking the thick silence.

"I don't know what you're talking about", I replied not wanting to give in, he couldn't control me and how would he even know I had the disc?

Nate just looked at me without saying another word.

I kept my gaze on him while he made his way over to my mirror, where I had tapped a picture of the two of us.

"Can you believe it was Jules?", he asked while taking the picture off of the mirror and shoving it right into his pocket.

"I need that disc now", Nate ordered while stepping back in front of me.

I didn't say anything for a second, I gulped before looking back up at him, "I don't have it".

Without saying another word, Nate took out all of the bullets from the gun but kept one inside. He spun the little bullet holder before snapping it right back in its place.

A tear escaped my eyes before I came face to face with the metal-killing object.

"Take a deep breath", he whispered as I started to cry. The cold metal was pressed against my forehead, slowly pushing me down to lay on the bed.

How had my life turned into this? I kept asking myself, not knowing if this would be my last moment on this earth.

It couldn't be, I had so many things to do. I wanted to get married one day, I wanted to have kids one day, I wanted to talk to Cassie one day, I wanted to graduate one day, I wanted to move out, I wanted to talk to my biological mother again, I wanted to fall in love.

I had so many more things I wanted in my life but all of my hopes could just end within one second.

My heart was pounding so heavily that I was scared it might pop out of my chest.

Nate climbed on top of me, his face was super close to my face, I could feel his warm breath on my cheeks.

"Stop it Nate", I cried quietly, while the boy held the gun to his head.

Why was this making me even more scared? I couldn't lose him, whatever he did, it didn't matter in that second. I never wanted to lose him.

He pressed his lips against mine before pulling the trigger, many more tears streamed down my face and I knew I was having a panic attack any second.

"Stop it, Nate, Stop it, please stop it", I kept crying all over again, I couldn't remember how many times I said those two words, "I love you Nate, please stop it".

But he wouldn't stop, he pulled the trigger two more times and I have never been this scared in my entire life.

Nate loaded the gun one more time, now it was a 50/50 chance he was going to shoot himself dead, "It's in my purse, it's in my purse", I whispered.

Finally, Nate dropped the gun making me gasp for air. I felt as if I had been holding my breath for the past five minutes and honestly, I might have been.

Nate finally got up and I rolled over to the side, curling my body into a ball as I started crying my eyes out.

Nate got it and sat down on my bed. "Don't fucking touch me", I cried my voice shaking.

"Hey, I'm sorry, I was joking there were no bullets", the boy whispered but I didn't want to hear his voice again.

He finally left after I hadn't looked at him for the next few minutes. I heard him walk to Cassie's room but that was the last thing I heard.

I cried harder and harder with every second that passed. It was finally all coming out, everything.

The hurt I felt from knowing he cheated, the hurt I felt from my mother not wanting me, the hurt I felt from being betrayed by Cassie, the hurt I felt from every single situation I had been through.

I gasped for air even though there was none left for me.

And no matter how much I would cry and how much I would hate Nate for who he was or what he did. I would still love him, forever. 

Even when he held a gun to my head and been after he bruised me, I would forgive him in a heartbeat. All that mattered on this earth was Nate, and I was scared it might never change.

The love I had for this boy was, beyond.

****

Sorry, it's only a short chapter... I can't believe how far we are into the book already, makes me sad. 

I had been thinking about writing an Outer Banks story, would any of you read it?

And thank you all for the many views, I'm so grateful for all of you, I learned to love writing again and publishing stories, just because of you all. And thank you for the support with all the comments and votes you leave every day. I seriously love you all <3