I Miss You // Luke Hemmings | ✔️

~Three~

{A/N - warning self harm mentioned, sorry if it bothers you.

***
{A Month later}

I've been back to Luke's grave everyday for a month hoping to see him again. I'm starting to wonder if I'm insane and it was a trick of the mind. I don't even have his voice clouding my head like it did a month ago. It's like he's disappeared, left me... Again!

My best friend Michael, who was also best friends with Luke, doesn't understand my new obsession with visiting Luke's grave all the time. I mean it's not easy to tell your best friend that you may have seen your dead boyfriend's ghost and the only thing keeping you going is the thought of seeing him again.

Even worse is the fact that after about 2 weeks of no Luke since I saw his ghost that time, I've been cutting again but not just my wrists anymore. Tops of my legs too. I thought I was successful at hiding it with my long sleeved baseball style shirts and always wearing jeans. Unfortunately mum saw it when I had shorts on one day when I completely forgot about the scars. She makes me go to therapy twice a week now instead of once... It's hell!

Today is just one of those dreaded days but I'm taking Mikey along because I refuse to go with Mum anymore. I'd rather go alone but Mikey insisted. He knows about the cutting, Mum told him after she saw my legs. She probably hopes that he could help me, support me but no amount of help or support will ever bring Luke back.

Nothing will ever be okay. Nothing will ever be the same.

***

After my therapy session I get back in Mikey's car and he's studying me closely "what do you wanna do now?" he asks. I give him a look that says 'you know where I wanna go', he nods and sighs as he starts the car and pulls out of the car park. "Why do you visit him so much?" Michael questions as he drives.

The one question I didn't want to ever have to answer and my best friend just asked it straight out. I study my hands and bite my lip trying to think of a lie but nothing seems good enough. "I need to feel close to him, I feel closer to him there. You wouldn't understand..."

Mikey slams the breaks on causing the cars behind us to honk their horns angrily. "DON'T YOU TELL ME WHAT I UNDERSTAND! LUKE WAS MY BEST FRIEND, ALSO CAL'S AND ASH'S, WE ALL LOST HIM NOT JUST YOU!" he proper shouted at me, I just stared at him wide eyed until he finished and then I burst into tears, opened the car door and ran away from the car and Mikey. I ran towards the cemetery.

I got to the cemetery and found Luke's grave, I kneeled in front and rested my hands on the grass as I began to sob. Michael has never shouted at me like that before, he's such a laid back person. I must've pushed him so hard and I didn't even mean to.

A hand touches my shoulder for a moment I get excited and I turn around to find Michael looking at me like a sad puppy. My face falls as I was hoping for the ghost that is now what my life revolves around. "Not the somebody you were expecting?" Michael asks sounding hurt. I sigh "I want to tell you something but you won't believe me and I can't tell you".

Mikey sits beside me on the grass concern filling his features "I didn't mean to shout. I don't know what came over me" he said softly. I nod and try to smile, he wipes my tears off my cheeks "don't cry, he wouldn't want that" Michael smiles. I know he means Luke by the word 'he' and I know Mikey is right but part of me remembers how I argued with ghost Luke that night a month ago and now I'm wondering if he refuses to ever see me again because of what I said.

I didn't mean to push him away again, I was just angry that he left me the first time.

***

Michael drove me home that evening and then went home himself. I decided to get an early night but was rudely awoken by a cold draft in my room...

I look around the room not seeing anything, I check the clock "02:34". I then glance at the end of my bed and standing there looking a little faded but still recognisable as the boy he once was is ghost Luke. I then realise my window is open and the curtains are blowing in the wind. "Shut the damn window, where you raised in a barn?" I moan. Luke chuckles and shuts it "sorry I don't feel the cold, I forgot" he smiles as he sits on my bed.

I sit up and lean my head on his shoulder, he wraps his arm around me sending a cold shiver up my spine. "Why haven't I seen you for a month?" I question him. "I've been busy but I promise you'll see me everyday now" Luke replies softly. I nod and yawn, he looks at me and smiles "you go back to sleep, I'll be here" he tells me as he climbs into my bed behind me and wraps his ghostly arm over my waist. I instantly relax to his cold touch and soon fall asleep.

I wake up to an empty bed, no Luke. I quickly look around my room for any signs of him, I'm about to give up when I notice a piece of paper on my dressing table with a pen beside it.

On the paper is a small letter, it reads;

"Dear my sweet Khyra,

I know our meeting last night was brief for you and I feel bad for making you wait so long to see me again. I enjoyed holding you for a special night like I used to, you've always looked so cute when you sleep.

Love your Lukey Xxx
Ps. I love you always <3"

He had obviously got bored at sometime last night because there were a few drawings of cartoon penguins on the paper like he used to do. I found myself smiling at the paper like an idiot, I took it back to my bed with me and held it close to my chest and let my first tear of happiness in a long time slip out.