I Miss You // Luke Hemmings | ✔️

~Four~

A few weeks have passed since Luke's reappearance in my bedroom, as promised he has visited me everyday and sometimes even spent the night with his ghostly arm wrapped around my waist. I won't lie, I enjoy his presence, it calms me. I find it funny how I never know when he'll pop up but when he does an instant smile fills my face, and somehow all my worries leave me until he leaves.

When he leaves... That's a different story. I sink back down into my deep, dark depression that seems to consume me. The blade of the razor seems to find my wrists and legs again and the blood drains down the plug hole of the shower. I make sure I cover my wounds with some plasters and bracelets on my wrists so that the plasters aren't obvious.

I'm going out with the guys today for like the first time in forever. It's my Birthday today, 3rd April, Calum wanted to do something just the four of us... It doesn't feel right saying that, there used to be five!

My Mum has offered to take us all into town so that we can have a few drinks and enjoy ourselves without having to worry about how we're getting home. It's my 18th so may as well try to enjoy it. We've already picked Mikey and Ash up, just got to pick up Cal.

When we reach Cal's house I get out, I'm about to knock on his door when he springs out of it and about knocks me over. I laugh and he chuckles as he pulls me into a hug "how you keeping KhyKhy?" That's his nickname for me. I give him a fake smile and pull the sleeves of my ATL hoody down to cover my wrists, Calum doesn't know about the cutting. "I'm doing okay" I lie to him. He beams the biggest smile "happy birthday by the way! Ready to get drunk?" he teases. I nod and smile. We get in the car and Mum drives us all into Sydney.

Mum pulls up in a car park and let's us out. I wave bye to her and walk with the guys into town. "Let's go bowling" yells Michael excitedly. I laugh and give a nod of approval to his suggestion. Ash and Cal let out cheers of excitement and Michael takes my hand and pulls me towards the Bowling place.

Once we've booked our alley and traded our shoes in for the extremely uncomfortable, tight bowling shoes. We make our way over to the alley and choose some balls. I pick the lightest 2 I can find, while the guys get all the heavy ones.

We're halfway through the second game, I take my turn but before I release the ball from my grasp I hear his voice... "I'll help you, throw the ball Khy!" I do as he says and roll the ball down the alley. I'm not sure if the guys see or if only I can but ghost Luke mischievously guides the ball straight into the middle. I watch as I get a strike and let out a squeal as I run back to the boys and hug them all.

I turn back around expecting to see ghost Luke smiling smugly at me but he's gone. Just like that. I didn't get to thank him...

The boys don't seem any different so I assume that only I was able to see Luke. I'm glad about that in a way, that means that I can keep him my secret!

***

Another bowling game later Mikey and I have a lead of 2-1 over Cal and Ash. We decide to end it there and head to the clubs. I have my driving licence as ID so I'm good. All the boys are old enough too, Cal already being 19 in January and now that Luke's gone he's the youngest of the boys.

We all pile into one of the clubs that Mikey is always talking about when I see him, it's one of his favourites. Cal decides to order us some vodka shots mixed with God knows what to start us all off.

There's 3 different types of shots for each of us on the bar when the barmaid sets them down. I eye the bright coloured shots suspiciously and shoot Calum at look. He smirks and takes the pleasure in handing me my first shot of the night.

"DOWN IT! DOWN IT!" the boys chant together as I hold the shot glass. "Here goes nothing" I mutter to myself before downing the first shot. The boys all cheer and then pick up some shots themselves.

Later the boys got a fish bowl between us and some jäger bombs. I may have drunk a lot more shots and we may have started a drinking game too. I didn't care though, for once I was happy without Luke. I had forgot about him temporarily, even if the alcohol would wear off eventually and reality would come back to me.