All Your Strength- Levi X Reader (SH, Depression)

Chapter 6

Two voices sounded so far away. One male and one female. Your eyes refused to open just yet, you laid there listening trying to understand what they were saying. You were laying on something soft, definitely not outside anymore.

"100 Laps Levi, seriously. She split tea on you by accident... she didn't kill your cat." Hange's voice

"Whatever shitty glasses. Y/n needed to learn a lesson. She was also drunk and acted like a fool with Yeager last night..." Levi responded.

"Ohhhh someone's jealous! You have a crush on this one Captian?" Hange teased

"Fuck off. No I don't. Anyways now that I think of it, she didn't really eat anything last night, only a small chunck of bread. She drank plenty though..."

"Well I don't know what to say Levi, maybe go a little easier next time. Can't have our squad mates fainting all the time. She'll be fine, just passed out from exhaustion. Want me to stay until she wakes up?" Hange was always so caring.

"No ill just wait by myself, I have paperwork to finish" Levi said.

"Okay well your welcome! Bye shorty" you could hear Hanges foot steps run and the opening and closing of a door.

"Fuck off" Levi hissed.

Your eyes were still closed, there was no energy to open them. Levi's footsteps made their way closer to you, you heard him kneel down beside you.

His thumb gently brushed your cheek, wiping something off. It stung when he touched it. The pain was enough to make your eyes flutter.

"Y/n are you awake?" Levi asked quietly

"Mhhhhh" was all you were able to say.

"You passed out running, you should have ate something before your punishment" Levi stood up from kneeling.

Opening your eyes now you noticed that you were back in Levi's office, laying on the couch across from his desk.

"Sorry Captian, i didn't know i was running a marathon today." You opened your eyes. Instantly regretting the tone you had in your voice.

"Get up, you're filthy. You can shower here, I don't want you fainting in the communal bathroom alone." He walked off into another room attached to his office.

You sat up off the couch, your head pounding still. Worse actually than before. Looking out the window you noticed the moon high in the sky. Fuck how late was it. Looking at his desk his clock read 10:56pm.

You got up and followed Levi.

In the next room was a large bed, with 6 pillows, black sheets and a dark green duvet. It was the nicest bed you've ever seen. The sheets were perfectly made, as if no one ever slept in it. Through another door you saw Levi in the bathroom. He was holding a towel and some simple clothes, a t-shirt and sweatpants.

Fuck me.... a t-shirt. No long sleeve? your thoughts raced.

"Here take these and clean up, shower should have hot water, the Commander Wing has a better supply then the communal bathrooms." Levi's voice almost sounded sympathetic.

The communal bathrooms never had hot water, always cold. It was absolutely dreadful.

You thanked Levi as you took the towel and clothes from him. You shut the door behind you, reaching to lock it.

Fuck, no lock!? Weird

You turned on the water and stripped down. You removed the day old gause from your wrists and legs and stuffed it to the bottom of the trash can. Throwing some bathroom tissue on top to hide it. Stepping into the shower the hot water pricked at your skin.

Oh my gods it felt good. You stood there under the water allowing the dirt, blood and stress to fall away. Your cuts burned in the hot water but you didn't mind. You started shampooing your hair with whatever Levi had available. Lemon scented shampoo, who would have guessed...

After what seemed like forever you reached for the soap to wash your body. The bar slipped right out of your hand and fell onto the ground. Reaching for it way too fast your vision started spotting again. Ears ringing, you were so dizzy, on the verge of fainting again.

Scared out of your mind you screamed,

"LEVI!"

Two seconds later the door flew open, Levi was ripping the shower door open to catch your uneasy body. He was insanely fast.

"Fuck sakes y/n, whatre you doing!" He hissed at you.

You reached for the wall to stabilize yourself, when Levi's eyes widened in horror. Looking directly at your wrists, cuts of all shapes and sizes marking your skin. He then glanced down notiticing the ones on your legs, and even some on your stomach.

"Y/n.... what is this...." His voice flat. No emotion at all.

You couldn't even meet his eyes. Shame crushed over you, tears filling your eyes. How disgusting you must look. Your knees buckled and you fell to the shower floor. Levi bent down to catch you. You started sobbing  uncontrollably, wrapping your arms around your legs, trying to hide the scars that littered your body.

Levi exhaled, turned off the shower and picked you up... the motion was so fast your head started spinning again. His body was cold compared to the hot shower. Naked he carried you to the bed, placing you down on the edge.

"Hold on" he muttered. Returning with a large white towel, he wrapped it around you. He went back for the clothes.

You kept your eyes down, focused on the floor. Numb, you felt nothing. Levi was the first person to ever find out you cut. How stupid of you to get caught.

"Lift" Levi tapped your leg gently, helping you put your pants on, he tapped the other leg too.

"Stand" He commanded, you followed his order. He pulled the pants up over your waist. Still looking down you could feel his eyes on you.

He held the t-shirt in his hands. Looking at your arms and back to the shirt he walked around you to the dresser. You heard the drawer open and him reaching inside, grabbing at clothes.

"Tch, I guess this'll do" He returned with one of his button down collared shirts, long sleeved...

Putting your arms into both sleeves he stared buttoning it from the bottom up.

When he was done he pushed down on your shoulders gently, guiding you to sit again.

He knelt in front of you, his hand lifting to take your chin in his fingers. Your eyes finally flickered up to meet his. Filled with worry he looked into what felt like your soul.

"Y/n, please.... tell me what happened" Levi whispered

You took a deep breath in.

"You wouldn't understand" you sobbed.

"Try me..."

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