You wiped the salty tears from your cheeks once more before entering the entrance of your room.
"What the hell took you so - hey, what happened?" Yelena cut herself off when she noticed your bloodshot eyes and puffy red nose.
You felt guilty.
And it made you mentally cry, the image of Natasha begging you to go back and be with her repeatedly replayed in your mind, not giving you the peace of mind that you were craving.
"You okay?" Shuri asked in concern.
Maria groaned, "Of course, she's not!"
"I'm good." You forced a smile, trying to change the subject by saying, "Where's my onesie?"
"Here." Shuri handed you the soft brown clothing, "You're the monkey because you are so hyper."
"That's Yelena!" You chuckled before sauntering towards the bathroom to change.
After five minutes, you went out to see that they'd already picked a movie, which was Enola Holmes.
Tewkesbury's hot but, of course, your gay ass finds Enola hotter.
Louis was handsome though, was attempted to force me to be straight but nah, I'm good being gay.
Elle's thoughts, but yeah, need to go back to the story now.
Yelena patted the space beside her, opening her arms in a signal for you to cuddle her which you obliged as you knew that you desperately needed a comforting hug, "You sure you're okay?"
"Mm." You hummed in response before shoving a mouthful of popcorn in your mouth to signal her that you're not talking anymore, just eating.
~ Timeskip ~
It was the part where Enola realized that her name was Alone if it was scrambled upside down and the word 'alone' made you let out the sob that you were trying to hold back ever since you entered this room.
That word made you remember Natasha again.
Her, being alone in that cold kitchen, was probably angry at you for leaving her like that.
You assumed that she despises you with all her guts after what you did to her a while ago because like you said, you can't.
You can't be with her when you were still lost.
You have a goal; to find yourself back and safe in Scarlett's arms.
Okay, I know, here we are with Scarlett again.
But it's just what it is.
Yelena glanced over you as she was the only one who was awake at this moment because Shuri and Maria were now peacefully snoring on your bed.
"Hey, hey, hey." Yelena pulled you closer to her, "I'm here, let it all out, it's okay."
She rubbed your back to comfort you. Yelena waited patiently for your cries to somewhat stop, to the point that you could talk properly, before looking at you with concerned eyes, "I know the second that you opened the door that you weren't okay, so, tell me what happened?"
"I know you'll despise me," You sniffed before adding, "But, um, I broke up with your sister yesterday, and just before I got here, she drunkenly begged me to be with her again, and then - then I left her there, on the kitchen table, alone and crying."
"I knew something was up," Yelena muttered with a frown, "I don't hate you though, I know where you are coming from but I want to ask you, do you love Natasha?"
It took you a couple of minutes before managing to let out a small, "...I don't know."
You were in denial.
It was obvious, even Yelena could see it, feel it even.
But she didn't object.
You knew you were being selfish for being so, you knew you love her but, again, you can't be with her.
You have this characteristic that you always have to fix yourself first before going through a relationship, in that way, you are assured that you won't cause too many problems to your partner.
"Is there any chance that you'd let me know how did you two break up so I'll know how painful it is, and how to fix it, of course."
"You don't need to fix anything." You chuckled lowly, before sighing and began telling the story.
Your serious voice caught Natasha off guard, everybody knows you for being a bubbly person and you were never damn serious on any occasion, even if you were getting scolded, you always find a way to make things lighter and funnier.
It was a power of yours that Natasha admired and fell in love with.
You awkwardly cleared your throat to bring her back to reality when you noticed that she seemed interested in your lips, "Natasha?"
"Oh, yeah, sorry." The blonde apologized sheepishly, embarrassed about her actions, "What's up?"
You were nervous but again, if you didn't clear things up right now, then you won't have the heart and courage to do it on another day.
"You know that I have a 'situation', right?" You questioned her, not looking at her curious gaze as you decided to play with your fingers.
A habit of yours whenever you are nervous or scared of something which made Natasha furrow her brows.
She knows what was about to happen but, god, she hoped that what she was thinking was the opposite of what you will do or say.
"Mm?" Natasha hummed in acknowledgment, signaling you that she was listening to every word you were saying, not bothering to touch the Chicken Paprikash on the bowl as the fear already removed the hunger from her system. "I know."
"And you know that I'm not..." You trailed off in a whisper as you were afraid of what will happen, "What I'm saying is that, I'm not your girlfriend so therefore we're not in a relationship, and even if we are, then I'm breaking up with you."
"You don't mean that, right?" Natasha laughed, but the sound that she let out quivered in nervousness, "Because baby, I know-"
"Stop calling me baby." You shook your head with a frown, finally looking at her in the eyes only to regret it once you saw that her eyes were being clouded with tears, "I'm sorry, Natasha."
With that, you stood up, not having the heart to gaze at her face once more because your heart tears apart as you looked at her broken expression.
You didn't even get the chance to step your foot on the floor before Natasha grabbed your wrist, "Y/n, come on, don't do this. I know you don't want to."
"You don't know anything about me, Natasha." You shook your head, yanking your arm from her grasp before sprinting outside the hallway.
You know that it was an asshole move but you knew it was the right thing that you did.
