What could have been.

- Chapter 44 -

"Sienna, what happened?" My bed dips slightly from Eden sitting near where my head rests, buried into my pillow.

The weight of my chest is slowly tiring me out. Maybe, it's the universe trying to take me out of my misery.

Eden stands. I haven't got eyes on her, they're too busy being screwed shut, trying- failing to stop more tears from coming.

"Jocelyn, I'm really worried," Eden whispers into her phone. "How far are you?" She responds to Jocelyn. There is a pause. I can feel Eden's eyes on me. I continue to cry into my pillow, curled up on my side. At this moment, my mind is numb to what happened but my body can't help but react.

"Sienna?" Eden's hand runs through my hair, pushing away loose strands from my face. "I'm here, ok? Jocelyn's on her way." Her voice lowers. "Should I call Cole?

I shake my head, lifting it slightly to look at her. "No."

"Do you want to talk about it? No pressure?"

I do. I do want to talk about it but where do I begin?

Do I start at the part where Joseph showed up after my lecture had finished to ask me to meet with him? Do I then explain that I stupidly agreed too? Or should I start from how I met Joseph last year and how oblivious I was to how horrible he'd be? How I was fooled by his charm?

My phone begins to buzz in my coat pocket that I'm still wearing. I reach my hand in and place my phone on my bedside table. I'm in no mood to answer any calls.

"What happened to your phone?" Eden's voice is raised with concern. "The screen is cracked?"

Should I start there? Should I start at the part where my phone fell out of my hand as I was running away? My phone dropped a second time, causing most of the damage when Joseph reached to pick it up and I pushed him away. Would that be a good place to start?

"I'm here." Jocelyn breathes out. She sounds like she has just run a marathon.

My eyes stay fixated on my phone, as Jocelyn and Eden stand by my bedroom door. My tears have dried up. I think I've run out. Eden tries to lower her voice so I can't hear as she explains to Jocelyn what she knows this far, which is nothing.

My phone lights up, this time with a singular buzz. I have a text.

A hurried knock on the front door, causes us all to stop and look in the direction of the hallway. "I'll get it," Jocelyn announces.

I sit up and grab my phone. I'm surprised it's still usable. There is no part of the screen that hasn't got a crack going through it.

5 missed calls from Joseph.

I open up my most recent message. It's from him.

Joseph: I know I hurt you. I just want to make sure you're ok. I'm outside. Just let me know you're ok and got home safely and if you don't want to see me then I'll leave.

"Joseph." I blurt out.

Eden snaps her head in my direction, stepping closer. "What?"

"Joseph-"

"What did you do?!" Jocelyn shouts.

"He's here," I say in a faint voice, coming out strangled from the weight in my chest returning.

Eden's eyes widen as Jocelyn continues to shout at Joseph. "Stay here. We'll get him to leave."

Eden joins Jocelyn by the front door, in a calmer voice asking for him to leave. I can hear him asking if I'm ok. It's laughable. Why would he care? He's the reason why I'm so miserable.

The walk from my bedroom to the door is usually short but, at this moment, it was not remembered. One minute I'm lying-in bed hoping Eden and Jocelyn are successful in getting Joseph to leave and the next minute I'm staring at him while he tries to get by the two of them to reach me.

"Sienna, please." He tries again to step past Jocelyn, failing, she blocks him from passing the threshold.

I blink, and Joseph is on the floor with his hand wrapped around his jaw. I blink again and Cole's standing over Joseph. Third blink, Jonah is pulling Cole off of Joseph. Jocelyn and Eden are both shouting for Cole to stop. That's until Cole breathes out. "It was you."

"What?" Eden's voice is quiet.

My words come out trembled. "He did it."

Jonah continues to fight his hold on Cole.

Joseph's eyes glass over.

My chest tightens and a final exhale of breath leaves my lips, followed by the truth. "Joseph was the person that drugged me."

Realisation silences the room.

My words, cause for stillness in everyone. Nothing but heavy breathing can be heard. The strains loosen in my chest enough for me to say all that I have left to say to Joseph. "Go to hell. I don't-" My voice breaks and my tears return. "-ever want to see you again."

Jocelyn looks back at me, her expression turns from worry to anger in a matter of seconds. I look over to Eden and her hand is covering her mouth.

Closing my eyes, I recount the moment I found out the truth.