𝐄𝐳𝐫𝐚 | 18+

30

⚠️TW: physical violence and mention of abuse⚠️

I clutch the sheets close to my face, watching as the sharp shadow of a tree outside dances across my wall. I know it's ridiculous that it's keeping me up, but I seriously can't fall asleep. I've been staring at the wall for three hours, blindly hoping for sleep to find me. But it never does. I'm tired but I can't fall asleep, I find it one of the worst feelings you can feel. I flip over onto my back and sigh, before getting up and navigating my way through my room to reach the door. I walk through to Ezra's door and crack it open. He's laying on his side, with his back facing me. His bare arm is hugging the blanket close to his chest.

"Ezra?" I whisper, checking if he's awake.

"Hm?" He hums, turning over to face me.

"Are you awake?" I ask, gripping the doorframe anxiously.

"No, I'm dead." He brings his arms up and covers his eyes.

"Good. Can I sleep with you?" I ask, but as soon as it comes out of my mouth I hear how wrong it sounds and my eyes go wide. He chuckles and rolls over to the side of the bed.

"C'mon." He says, resting his head on his crossed arms on the pillow. I slowly walk in, closing the door behind me, and climb into the bed. I lay down and pull the sheets over me.

"Thank you." I whisper.

"Mhm. Can't sleep?" He asks. I can see the sharp edges of his facial features under the soft glow of the moon coming from outside. I guess he doesn't like closing his curtains.

"No. There's an assassin tree outside my window." I say, closing my eyes. I feel a lot safer in his presence because I can just tell the tree to get him first. Right? Kidding. Maybe.

He hums.

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I'm startled awake when a foot harshly slams against my leg. I groan and rub my leg where it aches. I look beside me and see Ezra flipping and turning, muttering things under his breath.

"No...please, stop...no," He mumbles, his eyebrows furrowed as his chest heaves up and down. His hands fist into the sheets and beads of sweat cover his forehead.

He's having a nightmare.

"Ezra." I tap his shoulder, trying to wake him from the dream. He doesn't budge, so I shake his shoulder.

"Ezra!" I whisper.

His eyes snap open and it all happened so fast.

He flipped on top of me with his arms around my throat. He presses me into the mattress, choking me mercilessly. His eyes scream only anger as he blocks off my airways, squeezing me lifeless. I gasp, trying to free my neck from his iron grip, but nothing works.

"Ezra!" I squeak, using the little air I had left. "It's Delilah!" I gasp. I try to kick him off with my feet but he's straddling my waist. He's chocking me with so much hate and I don't know where it's coming from. My vision starts to blur and my chest burns from the absence of oxygen. My eyes tear up. I grasp into his hands and give my last strength in trying to push him off but it's useless. I repeatedly snap my hand against his chest in order to get him off of me but it's to no avail, he just pushes me harder into the bed.

Suddenly his eyes widen with some sort of recognition and he rips his hands away from me, stumbling backwards. I gasp and cough, bringing my hands up to my neck. I breathe deeply, trying to soothe the ache in my chest. I look to see Ezra staring at me, shook. He seems just as surprised as I am, except that he wasn't just on the verge of death. I crawl as far back as I can, until my back hits the bed frame.

"Lilah..." Ezra says, stepping towards me.

"Stop." I hiss, still holding my neck. I don't know what got into him but I'm scared it'll happen again. I won't live through it if it happens again.

"I'm sorry, I-" He shakes his head slowly, dragging his hands along his face.

"I think I should go..." I mutter. When he doesn't answer, I jump off and make my way to my room. I open my door and switch my light on. I make my way to the mirror and ogle my reflection in the mirror.

"Shit..." I mutter, moving my head from side to side to look at my neck. There are black and blue fingerprints all over my neck where Ezra was strangling the life out of me. Three knocks on my door startle me and I watch it's reflection in my mirror. Ezra slowly peeks into the door.

"Please leave." I say breathlessly.

"I just want to talk," He says, a pained tone in his voice. I look into his eyes, searching for some sort of indicator to tel me if he was planning on trying to kill me again. But there's nothing but sincerity in them. Unless he's just a good actor.

"Okay...but stay over there." I say, pointing to the end of the room. I sit down on my bed, leaning against the bed frame, as he steps in and leans against the wall. He huffs as his back slides down until he's sitting on the floor.

"Well?" I say, encouraging him to speak. He brings his knees up and rests his elbows on them, his hands covering his eyes.

"I'm sorry..." He says. "I thought you were someone else..."

"Who else would it be?" I ask, a bit annoyed. Sorry isn't enough, he almost killed me.

"I thought you were my father..." He says softly. "Can I?" He asks, pointing towards the bed. I nod slowly. He gets up and sits at the edge of my bed, his back hunched over.

"Why would you strangle your father?" I ask softly. By the way he said it, I can tell that something is seriously wrong and that it pains him to tell me.

"It's hard to explain..." He says quietly, as if to himself, I almost don't hear him.

I patiently wait for him to explain, sitting on the bed with my legs crossed.

"My father...he uhm..." He trails off, drumming his fingertips on his cheek.

"He abused me." He finishes. My eyes widen a bit at hearing that.

He was abused?

"Ez..." I mumble. I scoot over to him and rest a hand on his back.

"Please don't touch me." He says. I immediately remove my hand from him and back up a bit, still freaked out from what happened earlier.

"That's horrible." I say, hoping to comfort him. I've never been good at comforting, but I know that having someone on your side is the first step to do so.

"I know..." His voice cracks and he sniffles.

"It's okay, Ez. I'm here." I say. I completely forget about what he said earlier and rest my face on his back, circling my arms around his broad shoulders. He leans back into my touch and sighs.

A soft cry escapes his lips. I hold him as he lets himself unravel.

"Come here." I say. I crawl back to the edge of the bed and open my arms. He makes his way next to me and I pull him close to me, so that his head is resting on my shoulder and collar bone. I wrap my arms around him and gently run my hand up and down his back, my other hand threading through the locks of his hair.

Silence is quiet but says thousands of words at the same time.

He breathes deeply and I rest my head against his.

"I'm here for you." I say softly, brushing the pad of my finger under his eye to wipe his tear away.

He remains silent, but squeezes me in his hold.

I closed my eyes and at some point, I drifted off to sleep.

word count: 1360
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heyooo lmk what u think so far!
Stay safe<3
-S