✅ My Sister's Problem

28. The Truth

"Sally?" Mum's voice came from outside my door, followed by a gentle knock. "Are you okay?"

I got up and opened the door, offering her my chair while I sat on the bed. She closed the door behind her, so I guessed this would be about Lindy's threats. Something she didn't want Lindy to hear from the foot of the stairs.

"What's up?" I asked, absentmindedly picking up my basketball and passing it from hand to hand. I still couldn't spin it on a fingertip or any of those fancy tricks, but it was already feeling more natural in my hands, the weight and shape of it. Holding it right made a big difference.

"I saw the videos your sister made," she said slowly, taking her time. I guess this must have been hard for her as well. "And Chel Eisen mentioned something about a practical joke going awry. I don't know if that's related. Is that something I should talk to you about? It worries me."

I thought for a few seconds, and nodded slowly.

"I think I should probably tell you, but it's hard. I don't want to cause any more trouble. Lindy's having enough problems. She just wants to feel like she's in control of something. If it can't be her own... control... she wants to tell me what to do."

"I understand that. But blackmail is taking it too far. She can't learn that it works. I wasn't too sure what to do with regards to her punishment, when I saw those videos. I guess... should I have asked your opinion first?"

"You mean should it have been harsher?" I asked, buying myself a few seconds to think. "I don't think so. I know that she was crossing a big line there, but I can't really blame her. Cackling villain is better than mopey and morose. And I kind of..."

"Like it?" she finished the sentence for me, but not in the way I'd been thinking. It was about as far from the truth as I could imagine.

"No!" I said. "No, I was going to say I blame myself. I was really nasty the last time she had this problem, I was putting her down all the time. So maybe she deserves to get her own back a little. How could I like that kind of thing?"

"I don't know. But when she was teasing you, talking to you like you're the little sister, I'd swear you were trying to hide a smile. Not the humiliation, I think, but being treated like the little one. You said I could talk to you like that, didn't you?"

I could only nod. It was hard to get past my aversion to the things Lindy had demanded I do, and the way she'd tried to force me. But maybe there was a grain of truth in there somewhere. I tried to remember, and thought that when she'd started by dictating what I would wear for bed, I might actually have felt lucky. If she didn't take it too far, maybe Lindy treating me like her baby sister felt more real than when I'd played the part for Mum. But why would it make a difference?

"It's a hard thing to think about," Mum said. "I can see that. But perhaps if I can ask you three questions. Separate the issue a little."

"Okay. And thanks, maybe I should ask you to help with my problems more often. There's like... things I can't see because I'm too close. What's the question?"

"First, how do you feel about other people treating you like a child? You mentioned a dream where we all did it, right? And I know you seem to enjoy it when I'm the one calling you my little girl. Because Mummy can make you feel safe. But would you still be happy if you imagined your sister talking to you like that? Or anyone else?"

"I don't know," I could answer that one right away. But then I thought back to the dream, and how wholesome and reassuring it had been. And Mum had said I was smiling at the start of the blackmail. Maybe that had been because I was relieved to feel I was atoning for the way I'd previously treated my sister? It was hard to be sure. "Well, maybe. I don't know how I felt when she started all that. I was too focused on the other demands, the gross stuff. But I think if it was treating me childishly, yeah. I think I'd be okay with that. But... no, I couldn't say that. I might like it if she talked to me like that, I'm not sure. But I couldn't stand her knowing that it made me feel good. That would just be weird."