Sad Song
Ciarra
Holding the wine closer to my lips, I stare at the busy streets of the city. I couldn't help but recall what happened at the event earlier today. The way we touched each other at the dancefloor, and the events that followed after that.
How could I be such a fool?
From where I'm standing at the balcony of my unit, I glanced at the white coat resting on the back rest of the couch. After the kiss that we shared, I just ran and actually forgot to return his coat.
Touching my lips, I closed my eyes and recalled what happened five years ago after I left.
"How could you jeopardize your sister's life like that, Lyubov?! You are well aware of the threats that you're receiving! And you decided to take your sister on a vacation?! Are you out of your mind?!"
My brother and I sat next to each other on the couch in the living room of our estate silently. After we got a call from our parents last night, demanding us to go back home immediately, we then booked a flight home. I haven't even got to say goodbye to Ali last night as we were in a rush. Our parents never scolded us like this. Now I know why.
I glanced at my brother who sat next to me, silent. His head was cast down, fingers intertwined as his arms rested above his knees.
"Where are they?!" I glanced up when our mom came rushing to the living room, looking angry and relieved at the same time when she saw us there sitting on the couch. She walked towards us and stopped in front of my brother.
I gasped when she slapped my brother across the face. My brother did not react at all when his head whipped to my side. I looked at him horrified and worried. He only slightly shook his head at me, silently saying that I should not interfere and that he deserved that slap.
My tears threatened to fall when I saw the defeat in his eyes.
"What the hell were you thinking, Lyubov Aglaia?!" My mom shouted. I never seen her so angry at my brother. They were always so close to each other. I was even jealous sometimes at how close they were. Surely, I was a daddy's girl, but I can't help but admire the connection that my brother had with my mother. Maybe because she had her during her teenage years and she had to take care of him alone, without a partner to rely on despite her aunt being there to support them.
"You know the dangers of being a lawyer when you accepted that case, Yula. Sure, you've won the case, but it doesn't erase the fact that your client's enemy is now targeting your head. Do you know how nervous I was when I found out that you took a vacation outside the country without us knowing? And you took your sister with you!" My mother angrily shouted as she pointed at Yula then later on pointed her finger at me.
"Don't. Ciarra." Dad immediately cut me off when I tried to speak, looking so disappointed at me. I didn't mind the hurt that I felt with the way my father looked at me, instead I was really worried about my brother. He wasn't the only one to be blamed for all of these. They should also be angry with me and not just with my brother alone.
"Both of you are not to step out of this city without our permission, you understand me?" I tried to complain, but mom immediately shot daggers at me. "Also, I'm confiscating all your devices. Those scumbags might've caught sight of your faces during your trip. You are not to contact anyone. I've also erased all your data, from your number to your connections and all your social medias. I don't want anyone tracing your location and—"
"You what?!" I asked my mother, horrified. Shit. I haven't told Ali about our departure. We only communicate through text and call, and I don't even memorize his number. I don't want him to think that I just left without a word.
"Is there any problem, Ciarra?" my mom asked, looking at me furiously.
"Can we at least contact our friends before you erase our data? Can we not at least say goodbye for a while?" I asked with a slight panic in my tone. I was somewhat hoping that my mother has not yet erased the data from our phones. She was dad's personal cyber security. She knows everything connected to IT since she worked for the company's cyber security, preventing unwanted hackers from gaining data online and offline.
"No. For all we know, they might be tracing your location right now. I'm not risking your life by allowing you both to make calls and say your farewells. We already lost a son, I don't want to lose you both, too." I cringed when she raised her voice at me.
Hearing about what happened to Leon, it was as if someone poured a bucket of water on me.
My mom immediately covered her mouth, shocked at her own outburst. I noticed dad stiffen and looked at me, worry laced in his eyes. My brother stood up and looked at our mother harshly. She glanced up at him, shame, worry and regret dancing in her blue orbs.
"Ciarra, baby, I..." she reached for my hand, but I pulled it away from her reach.
I silently got up from the couch and walked to my room, not minding their calls. Blindly walking at the halls of our house, my arm was suddenly yanked by someone. I looked up and saw my brother's worried face. "Arra, mom didn't mean that. I—we—ah..." he looked at a loss for words.
"Please let go." I softly whisper to him. I didn't have the energy anymore to pull my arm away from his hold. Looking hurt, he hesitantly let go of my arm. I turned my back and walked away.
I then proceeded to my room. I didn't even notice the tears that are silently falling from my eyes. Thinking of my little brother, my chest painfully tightened. After locking the door of my room, I slowly slid down, sobbing as I remembered what I did to him.
My thoughts were interrupted when I heard a phone ringing. I wiped the lone tear that fell on my cheek and went inside, looking for the source of the sound. I then noticed something blinking inside the pocket of the white coat on the couch. I walked towards it and fished out the phone that was constantly ringing.
Placing my empty glass on the coffee table, I didn't answer the call because it wasn't my phone in the first place. The caller ID showed that Keith was calling. I then left the phone when I heard my own ringing.
I picked up the call when I saw Razel's number.
"Oh good, you picked up. Where were you? Aliz said you left already without informing us. What happened?" I heard Keith's voice on the other line.
I told her that I wasn't feeling well and that I have to go home without informing them anymore. She then wished me well and said that we should talked more tomorrow.
Tomorrow. Is he gonna be there tomorrow?
I glanced at the phone that stopped blinking. I reached for it when I saw something familiar.
It was as if I was struck by lightning when I saw the photo displayed on the lock screen of the phone. It was a photo of me and Ali five years ago. We were both looking at the camera while I was eating a sandwich and he was kissing my cheek.
Another tear rolled down my cheeks knowing that after all these years, he kept that photo of us as his lock screen wallpaper.
My heart felt like it was being torn in half when I remembered that moment.
And how bad I wanted that moment to last.
