bits and pieces

°flowery mouth°

Hyunjin would've been fine anyway, being the loner that he is, not even a single friend or a single soul wanting to talk to him. he's good being alone with his books, it's calming and it gives him peace.

Hyunjin would've been fine anyway... but Felix happened.

it was one of those uncalled for situations wherein he got told to go to an office by his prof after class, and there they introduced him a boy, who has trouble in biography class, but more than that has very bright smile that seem to be a good match for the sun and its rays.

it was so bright and blinding and before he knew it, Hyunjin had already been pulled in, like one of those planets that's orbiting around a giant orb of lava and gas, he got this invisible chains around his neck that makes it hard for him to stay away

it was too late for him to roll up and take his feet off the quicksand he had accidentally stepped in the first time he accepted to tutor the boy with a beautiful smile.

they got closer after sometime and somehow he found the courage to confess, readying himself for a massive rejection. but that didn't happen.

the sunshine liked him back.

Felix liked him back.

they were happy.

after three years of being in a relationship, they decided to cohabitate.

they became even happier... well that's what he thought,

until his lover's smile changed.

he watched it die.

the way that the sparks in Felix's eyes slowly faded.

the galaxy in them turning into a void.

he watched as Felix's smile lost its fondness towards him.

Hyunjin watched it die.

but he was stupid and weak, you know?

he couldn't let Felix go.

he was willing to wait, hoping that maybe he can still find a way to rekindle the flames that once gave heat to the love they had.

he can't just lose Felix like that.

because he's weak and selfish. and he needs Felix.

"baby, I love you."

he whispered one night as he held on Felix tight in his arms like that would be the last time.

"that's so random. what's happening, are you sick?"

his lover answered, chuckling a little.

"I'm okay... just please... please tell me you love me too. I just- I need to hear it, Felix."

"you're so cute, love."

his lover cooes, and Hyunjin couldn't help the tears that has rolled down his eyes, making a puddle in their pillows.

even that word sounded like a lie...

a beautiful melody of a music that was about to die as it fades away. just like them.

his heart hurts and he felt his chest constricts everytime he sucks in a breath, but he tried to muster everything in him not to make a sound.

"Felix-"

"of course, I love you too, baby."

Hyunjin pulled him even tighter. the ringing in his ears amplifying, growing even louder.

"thank you, Felix." he heaved out a shaky breath, laying a feather kiss on the back of Felix's neck. "thank you so much."

•••