bits and pieces

i - °where the lines overlap°

w/n: minors please stay away.

      warning: explicit words and sexual contents.

°•°•

Hyunjin watched as the smoke of the cigarette uncurled from his lips and blends with the chilly night breeze until it slowly disappears before taking another drag, filling his lungs with the minty flavor of the bitter smoke -holding it inside longer than it should be, releasing it through a heavy sigh after.

He's been outside of the balcony for about 20 mins now and he's been hitting on stick after stick of cigarettes in hopes of it to somehow ease the heaviness that has been weighing down on his chest but it doesn't work. Nothing works, and it just all feels stupid by now- how he tries so hard to forget and shove everything aside desperately to no avail.

It feels stupid.

He felt stupid.

Inhaling in the cig for the last time, watching until the flames kissed the tip of the cigarette butt, he heaved out another breath of toxic smoke before gripping it tightly in his palms, welcoming the light burn on his skin.

He threw it into the bin and that's when he finally decided to go inside of his bedroom, closing the balcony door behind him.

"How are you, Felix?" He asked as he trudged his way to the boy lying helplessly on his bed.

He situated himself beside the said boy, admiring how he was spread on the bed so openly, hands and feet all tied at the four corners of the bed, with no means of escape. His mouth useless with a gag, nipple suctions occupying both sides of his chest; small vibrators on its max taped carefully on his almost limping cock, and a massive dildo going up and down- in and out of the man's puffy red hole, fastly and deeply, mercilessly.

There was white substance staining everywhere on his small body and onto the sheets, drool decorating all over the pillows, along with his tears that made a stained mess on his freckled face, making a light and wet puddle on the cloth covering his eyes.

"Would you look at that? I was even worried using these things with you for the first time but it seems like you're having the time of your life with these toys. You seemed to be getting along well with each and everyone of them." Hyunjin mutters bitterly as he runs his cold fingers on Felix's heated skin. "How fucking annoying." He adds before releasing Felix's left nipple from the nipple suctions and taking the pink and swollen bud in between his fingers teasingly, giving it a light pinch and a flick after.

Felix whimpered, wincing from both pain and pleasure.

Hyunjin pulled away, taking in the view of the beauty before him -his fuck buddy for 3 years, and it was almost pitiful if only he's not annoyed and mad on what's happening.

It wasn't supposed to be like this. He doesn't want to do this. His chest is heavy and his heart hurts so bad. He wanted to put Felix in pain -wanted him to feel the misery he was in, but seeing Felix obviously hurting like this just seemed to load more weight on his chest. It doesn't help his miserableness at all.

He sighed through his nose for the nth time that night before turning the vibrators down a little as he pulled the gag out of Felix's mouth, the boy taking in heavy and shaky breaths as soon.

"Say it, Felix." His tone straining with exhaustion but stern and domineering still.

"I- ugh - I'm okay." The other breathed out, his voice hinting of pain and a bit shaky. "Keep-keep going." He adds stubbornly, lying through his teeth.

Hyunjin gritted his jaw in anger, fuming for whatever reason.

He grabbed the remotes, once again, turning the vibrators up to their max, making Felix squirm pitifully, pulling his limbs to no avail -leaving a red and angry mark on his ankles and wrists from the ropes with a loud gasp and whimpers leaving his quivering, parted lips.

"Tell me to stop, Felix. Tell me to stop now!" He growled, his head getting clouded with frustration and scorching anger that's simmering under his skin.

He needs Felix to run away from him because he can't do it himself. He can't stay away from his little flower.

He needs Felix to do it and save himself before Hyunjin fully turns into a monster.

"I'm-I'm okay -ah! Hyun!"

The younger moaned, his name rolling out of his tongue sinfully, making him curl his hands into a fist with his nails digging into his palms.

And that's it.

Just like that, he snapped.

He couldn't take it anymore; he feels so suffocated like the longer Felix stays, the more the chains around his neck tightens and he just couldn't take it anymore. He took a hold of the remotes once again and immediately turned everything off.

He fished out a knife from the side table and made haste to cut the ropes to set the younger free, then rushed out of the balcony, lighting another stick with trembling hands and heaving a huge puff to fill his lungs with its toxins once again.

It didn't take long for Felix to follow him outside with only Hyunjin's oversized hoodie to hide his nudity.

"Hyunnie..." The younger softly trailed off, voice thick with worry and confusion.

"I'm sorry, Felix, but could you just go home for today? I'm really-" he paused, trying to compose himself by sucking in the night air, feeling its coldness kiss down from his throat through his lungs. "I'm just not in the mood today."

"Is it because of the-"

"No it's not." He lied. He just needs Felix to stop. "I'm just really tired." He turned his heels around, meeting Felix face to face but avoiding his eyes. "I'll see you another time, alright?" He tried to smile, but it just looked like a grimace and he wanted to smack himself.

"I... Okay, Jinnie." Is all the younger replied before going back inside, then leaving the apartment not long after with a soft clicking of his door.

"Ah... Fuck this shit." He whispered to himself.

He should've known better than to fall in love with his fuck buddy, someone he only shares heated moments with -because that's all they'll ever be.

It was convenient for the both of them on the start since Hyunjin doesn't want to be in a committed relationship and Felix just came out of a toxic and abusive one.

They both enjoy each other's company. Being friends in the open but each other's cock warmer and hole filler behind closed doors.

He goes to Felix when he's horny and needs release, and Felix does the same.

He should've known they'd only ever meet within those lines they made for themselves. Never to cross. Never to overlap.

It wasn't in the plan to spend time together even without sex and just sharing some cookies and brownies with coffee or tea from time to time. And it's definitely not in the plan that he'll fall in love with Felix little by little, until he drowns when he was the one who rejected Felix's confession over half a year ago. He was so dumb and confused that when Felix told him he wanna do it right with him, he laughed at him like the younger one just told him the most hilarious joke he's ever heard.

He knows he offended Felix, but he wasn't the one to say sorry, so they just left it at that. Hyunjin avoided the topic, and Felix didn't talk about it again.

He's just lucky then that Felix understands that he's a dumbass and still chose to stay with him.

He's a dumbass... That's why Felix found someone else.

He's a dumbass, that's why he realized he love Felix back too late.

He's such a big fucking dumbass.