(TW suicidal thoughts)
(Catras pov)
"of course, I thought this would be different, why did I think this would be different." I sit the while tears are rolling down my face I didn't care enough to wipe them away.
Shit, I still had the book in my hand.
the tears on my face dropped on the pages of the book while I look down at it, my tears have seemed to drop directly on the words forgive them.
reading the words on the pages just makes me cry more, making the tears on my face to roll faster while it seems the whole world is silent.
No beeping of the monitors...
No music...
no doctors talking about patients...
no car alarms...
no sounds of sobbing...
just silence...
I want to scream at the top of my lungs, I want to scream so loud to never hear this silence ever again...
but I can't. ..
I'm in a hospital and all I can do is sit here and cry like nothing ever happened.
all I can think is that old voice that I'm so familiar with telling me to harm myself.
to cut me, to find a way for something to hurt, to find a way to die.
in the middle of these thoughts my phone dings, I honestly wasn't going to look at it but after 5 minutes I did, I felt like I had to.
I look at my phone and it's Adora, wow I'm surprised.
Adora- Catra, I'm sorry.
Adora- Catra, please answer me.
Adora- I'm sorry
Catra- Go away
Adora- catra, no. please let me stay.
Catra- You know after everything we went through all of it, you treated me exactly like she did.
Adora- I know, I know, and I'm so sorry about it baby, I promise I won't do it again
Catra- don't call me baby, it doesn't matter if you won't do it again. you did it today.
Adora- please catra, I had a bad day at practice. I'm so sorry
Catra- I said go away. I won't ask again.
Before she can say anything I power off my phone. I it there with my phone in my hand, and my tears are rolling down my face. I don't know what to do.
no matter what I think about all I can think about is her, all I can think about is spending time with her at school, at home, at the diner. and even here
I love her so much but she promised she would never treat me this way. she promised after everything she still does it.
I keep thinking about the words in the book 'Forgive them", forgive them, how do you forgive someone after something like that
how do you forgive someone that lied after you trusted them with everything.
how do you forgive someone who broke your heart after everything?
simply, you can't.
but you sometimes have to no matter what.
god, what am I going to do?
(A/N okay, I know this chapter is shorter than usual but there will be a new one soon I swear I just wanted to split them up so I can have some moe time to brainstorm of what will happen next I want to put the best content for you guys. also thank you for 3k reads <3, well I hope you enjoyed it and I promise there will be a new chapter soon bye!
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What should I know (catradora)
FanfictionTW: Abuse, Self Harm, Suicidal Thoughts and more Catra weaver is a new senior at Brightmoon high. Her only friend is Scorpia Gray but she graduated last year. What will Catra do with her senior year, will she spend it alone or fine the special one? ...
