Bruised.

Chapter 24.

*WARNING* This chapter contains sexual abuse. Please, skip if it's triggering at any way.

"Nothing" I said once again smirking ironically. 

"That's what I thought!" He said silently. 

"What?" I said slowly turning my body towards him. "What did you say Tommy?" I yelled over his silence. 

"Nothing, love." He said smiling. 

"You did this. And you know it." I said with tears dripping down my cheeks. Tommy quickly raised up his hand and placed it around my neck, leaving me unable to breath. 

"And I can do it again!" He screamed with his face only a couple inches away from mine. "You better shut this little mouth of yours and stay quite. Otherwise, you are going to wish this soft little slap was all I did to you." 

I tried to breath through his tight hands but it was impossible. I raised my hands and tried to take his away by pulling them but the more I was trying the harder it was. "P..." Please, I tried to saying, only moving my lips. 

"You understand?" He asked me finally releasing my neck. I nodded positively. "You are mine Mia. Nobody touches you, nobody talks to you. In a year from now you will be done with school and you will be wherever the hell I am going to be. This is not over. We are not over. Remember this."

I nodded one more time.

"I want to go home." I said as Tommy grabbed my seatbelt and put it on me. 

"Not yet." He said and started the engine.

...

"Tommy, where are we going?" I asked impatiently as we were getting away from the highway and into the forest.

"Don't ask questions." He said barely looking at me.

It was already dark outside and Tommy hadn't said a word since we left the river. My heart was pounding as I stared out of the window and into the darkness of the woods. My body and soul was shaking. It was the first time in our relationship that Tommy's presence was not making me feel safe. I brough my knees close to my body and tried to stop the shivers. I was crying. "Please, Tommy. Take me home." Tommy stayed quiet. I was scared. Scared of the dark, as I always was. But now, scared of Tommy. Scared for myself. Suddenly he stopped the car and got out. I saw him walking away, which grew my fear even more. I jumped when he opened the door and pulled me outside. 

"What are you doing?" I asked thinking that Tommy was going to leave me right there. Instead, he grabbed me by my arm and started walking away, making me follow him. My arm was hurting, but I didn't dare to say anything. A few minutes later, we were standing in front of a gazebo. He pushed me, forcing me to sit down. He took a few steps back as I watched him placing his hands in between his hair. 

"I don't want this, Mia. I don't want to hurt you or be aggressive towards you. But you make me so angry. So angry!" He said walking back an forth as I was standing there, crying silently. "You make me so jealous. You and Fabio, or all these guys at school and back to your home town. You make me angry. You give me reasons, to be angry." He paused waiting for me to talk, but I didn't. "I want you!" He said coming closer to me. He tried to kiss me but I pulled away. He grabbed my face making me face him. "Kiss me." He said and without any hesitation, I kissed him slightly. "Kiss me more. He said grabbing me once again, aggressively. And I kissed him.

"Can we go home. Please."

"Not yet." He said placing his hand on my pants, pulling them down.

"Tommy, stop." I said tried to pull my body away from his. Only making him come closer, leaving me with no space to move.

"I am not waiting anymore, Mia." He said unzipping his pants.

"I don't want this."

"You will! I promise. You will like it."

"I don't feel ready. Tommy..." I kept crying as he stopped for a second. I took a breath in relief.

"I love you Mia. Remember this. I love you and I promise, I'll give you everything you need."

"This is not what I need Tommy."

"Shhh..." He said, forcing himself in me, making me gasp. I felt a sharp pain going through me. I tried to pull back and making him stop, but it was impossible, as he repeatedly kept going in and out of me. I was crying, silently. I was in pain and I was trying to resist. The time was going slower than ever. As Tommy kept going, thriving through my struggle, I could feel my body getting weaker and weaker. I finally let go and accepted the pain. I accepted the humiliation and the trauma he was putting me on. I could feel the blood flowing down my thighs. I was scared. I stood there, staring at the darkness ahead of me. He moaned. He was finished. He grabbed my face, and kissed me passionately. I was zoned out. A tear came out of my eyes. 

"It's okay. The first time is always painful." He said pulling his pants back up. "I love you, Mia." He said, as he pulled my pants up. 

"I'll take you home now." He exhaled helping me get up.

"Okay." I said.

I was only fifteen when I met Tommy Murphy. My first ever relationship. So many expectations, so many dreams, so much love. I was fifteen when I realized the reality of being in a relationship is nothing like you imagine it to be when you are young. Younger. Tommy Murphy was the first boy I ever fall in love with. I was only fifteen, when I had to leave behind every single person I loved and cared for, to make my boyfriend happy. I was only fifteen, when the pain started filling up my body. When the anxiety attacks where the only thing I had to deal with at night. I was only fifteen, when I started hurting myself. Only to turn sixteen and realizing that things, could indeed, get worse. And now I was sixteen. And I was carrying more pain than ever, more anxiety that my body and soul could ever take. My dignity was lost and everything I knew, went down with it. I was only sixteen. I wasn't ready. Fear, Tommy Murphy was now in charge of my body. Of my life. I was scared. I was captive. I was bruised...

"You love me, right?" He asked me as he pulled up, in front of my house. 

I looked at him. He was staring back at me. "I love you" I said. 

"Good!" He smiled and unlocked the door. I got out of the car only to feel the pain between my legs once again. I gasped. Every took I step, until I got to my room, was a reminder of what had just happened. I walked into the bathroom and washed away the blood from my underwear and my body. I took a shower with as much energy as I had left in body and I came back to my room. I suddenly felt a sharp pain stubbing me across my lower stomach. Moments later, everything turned black. And I lost consciousness.

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Hello everyone,

This was the chapter I've been avoiding for a long time to write, probably the reason why it's so short.  I just want to remind every one of you that you are loved. Even when you think you are alone, you are not. Talk. This is the biggest weapon against an abusive person, a narcissist. Don't let anybody make you feel any less than you are. You are strong, and you are heard. My heart goes out to every single person that has been through any type of abuse, mental, physical, sexual etc. Don't ever blame yourself or face the consequences for something someone else has put you through. You are loved.