GUN IN MY HAND

CHAPTER 55: SHARP FALL

'I don't wanna fall asleep

Don't know if I'll get up

Don't wanna cause a scene

But I'm dyin' without your love

Begging to hear your voice

Tell me you love me too

Cause I'd rather just be alone

If I know that I can't have you'

*DOROTHY'S POV*

"Why did we wait for so long?"

Spencer's question pulled me out of my daze as my brain tried to find back a notion of time between the vivid memories of the two kids and their blurry, uncertain future.

Yet it wasn't from my head that a trail of shiver was arising; it was from somewhere deep inside my guts, growing with the thumps of my heart, and nothing could stop it, neither the warm caresses of his hands nor the shining brown shades in his eyes, which only amplified my heart rate.

Even if he was still inside me, the hot tingles of bliss were quickly annihilated from my veins until I was frozen, and I'd never known I could come down so abruptly from an orgasm. But I understood when he pulled out of me, and my head cleared fully to take in the sharp reality, as sharp as a... blade.

"Hey, Shooting star, you're here?! I'm so good, I finished the job sooner, so thought I'd come." I could hear the thuds of his casual gait crossing my house and up the stairs, and even the smirk in his words. Therefore, I could still prevent the mess, yet I was paralyzed, including my brain, my breath, and my heart.

How could you even stop a mess from crashing anyway? I'd never managed to.

"By the way, you should tell your parents that the key under the– fuck..."

The crash had happened, a silence of apocalypse following it, at least until it was replaced by the same thuds of boots growing more distant on the wooden floor, and I reopened my eyes, which I hadn't realized I'd closed in a hopeless attempt to wake up from a nightmare that seemed to never end.

But it was the reality, and it shot painfully through every part of my body as I jumped up from the bed and ran after Blade like the mess I was.

I didn't even bother searching for my panties, grabbing a piece of pale fabric that must have been a sheet as I tugged on the train behind me, and I didn't know how it had come out so easily, if Spencer had moved away or if I'd pushed him away in my rush. But in that instant, I could only focus on one thing.

"Blade!"

He was already in the middle of the stairs when I passed my bedroom door, and my call sped up his steps.

I knew this sensation, the need to run away from the overflow and emptiness trying to swallow you. I'd been in that exact position, passing a doorsill and watching everything crashing down, except that my eyes had fooled me and Spencer had never cheated on me, while here, Blade had seen the horrible truth, and what I'd done, there was no word to make it right.

"Wait, I..."

I couldn't let him run away with that same dangerous rush. I may have had no word, but I had my legs, my hands, and the beats of my heart faster than ever, and I almost caught up with him at the end of the stairs.