Alive but Shattered | All of us are dead

: ̗̀➛ Chapter 40

"You know, I always love the rain," A voice interrupted Hee-seul from calming herself down as she felt a presence stand beside her.

Joon-yeong puts both of his palm on top of the railings and a couple centimetres away from Hee-seul's clenched fist, "It reminds me of my childhood where I always sneak out of our house to play outside and enjoy the downpour. And then I'll go home and my mom will scold me for playing in the rain but she'll prepare a hot choco with mallows to heat up my body. Rainy season has always been cozy and relaxing. It's like a tranquilizer that immediately makes me feel better no matter how hard my day is."

Hee-seul didn't answer because she's lost at words. She didn't know why Joon-yeong would suddenly open up the reason why he likes rainy season. The lad must've sensed that she's not going to respond so he follows up a question, "Do you know why the sky pours down?"

"Because the water droplets in the cloud gets too heavy and large so they fall down into rain." Hee-seul answers monotonously.

Joon-yeong nodded, "When the water vapour rises, cools down, and changes into tiny droplets of water, it formed a cloud. You know, our feelings are also like cloud? There are variables that contributes to form a certain emotion and there will be a time that it will feel so heavy that you have to let it go," Joon-yeong suddenly but softly grab Hee-seul's clenched fist to his palm, unclenching it as he continues, "Just like clouds, when there's so much water droplets, it will turn dark and will block the sunlight from warming up the earth. I know you're really trying hard to bottle up your emotion but there's no harm if you release it? We're all human and we're bound to break sometimes but that's why we have friends to pick us up and build us again."

Yes, friends. Joon-yeong wanted to smile bitterly but its his choice to stay as friend rather than pursuing her. Not only he doesn't know what she'll say but it will ruin his and Wu-jin's friendship and he doesn't want it. Friendship is better than love because it's permanent and much more simpler than love.

"You will fear me if I let go." Hee-seul didn't know why she said that but there's something in Joon-yeong's tone that made her mouth opens and blurt out her insecurities. What is this Hee-seul? You didn't care in the past so why would you care now?

"Fear is a natural response of our body but then there's acceptance. Everyone has their dark sides and if the people around you doesn't accept it, that means they're not real." Joon-yeong responded, flatting out her once clenches fist, "You shouldn't clench your fist so hard, it will start a wound and we're always using our hands. We can't risk to get infected."

"I know you didn't do what Ji-min accused you," he started again, "I heard the distress and the conviction on the tone of your voice no matter what language you used."

"I don't care."

Her response made Joon-yeong smirked, "That's the Moon Hee-seul I know."

Silence took over them as the cries of despair from the others becomes a background as it was washed out by the loud patters of the rain. Hee-seul's eyes drifted from Joon-yeong to the two guys near them to only find that they're already looking at her. Kyung nodded at her while Min-jun winked, making Hee-seul to roll her eyes before turning her attention back to Joon-yeong, "I think I can still take some water droplets."

Joon-yeong chuckles before his expression turned serious, "Did your Uncle told you why they suddenly abandoned us?"

"No, said that it was confidential," Hee-seul turn her heels around to face the dark sky again, "Fuck confidentiality when we're left here to die."

"Are you ready to die?" Joon-yeong's question made Hee-seul to halt and think her response before she smiles bitterly.

"If it means that I get to haunt the people responsible for this catastrophe and those people who clearly have the power to save us but decided to leave us to fend for ourselves, then yes," Hee-seul responded after a couple of silence and turns to the lad, "Are you?"