"Where are you right now?" Mikyung said over the phone, desperately trying to keep her voice from shaking. She couldn't stop her body though. She was crouched on the floor, shaking all over in the corner of what used to be her mother's hospital room.
Her father was doing the necessary paperwork and making funeral preparations. He'd offered to stay with her, but she'd insisted on going back to school. Sangyeon and his family had been the first people her and her father had told of the news, and they came over right away. Sangyeon's parents were helping her father. Sangyeon was waiting outside the room door, ready to drive her to wherever she may need, and then he'd be off to work.
Though the idea of doing so physically pained her, she knew she had to tell Haknyeon. And she had to do it in person.
"I'm in the library. Why?"
"Can you meet me outside the library in say... fifteen minutes? I have something I want to talk to you about," she said softly, surprised at how her voice sounded. She sounded like the life had been drained out of her.
She felt like that too.
"Okay," Haknyeon said on the other end of the phone, his voice hesitant. "Are you alright-"
"We'll talk when I get there," she said quickly, hanging up on him. She knew it was rude and she knew it would worry him, and the action only made her feel worse. But she couldn't handle the question right now. She wouldn't be able to lie to him. She'd break down again right over the phone, and she didn't want to do that. She wanted to hold it together. She wanted to be strong, even though it felt like she was falling apart.
Slowly, she picked herself up from the floor and went out to meet Sangyeon. His eyes were red from crying too. Still, he was doing a better job of holding himself together than she was, and he gave her a half-smile when she walked over to him.
"He's free to meet you?"
"Yeah," she whispered, unable to say more. They stood there for a moment, her unable to even look at him. She just looked at the floor, wishing that she could hear her mom's voice and laughter. Just one more time. There was so much she wished they could have done together. So much she wished she'd said sooner. But that was all gone now.
"It's hard," Sangyeon said softly after a moment.
"Very hard," she whispered back, her voice breaking. "I have so many regrets."
"And that's the last thing she'd want for you," he said, and though his voice was stern, when she looked up she saw tears in his eyes. "She'd want you to live with no regrets. She'd want you to live happily knowing you are loved and knowing that you loved her in the best ways you could. She'd want that for all of us."
She nodded, unable to say anything else. So she just stepped forward and gave him a hug. "You're right. I know you are. She loved you, you know. She loved you like you were her own son."
"I know," Sangyeon said. "I'll forever be grateful to her and her kindness to me. She helped me when I needed it the most... she was a wonderful woman."
"The most wonderful," Mikyung said, finally finding the strength to smile through her tears. "I'm very lucky to have known her."
