The Caterpillar

Fear

"In the back of my my mind I still felt fear. Fear of what's to come, fear of confrontation, fear of everything."

Novas POV:
Journal ~
November 18 2021
Fear, that overwhelming feeling,that pit in your stomach consuming you it's sometimes short lived but this type was never ending, perpetual. It haunted you, made you wonder which was worse this feeling or the person causing it.

I wake up not being able to move something was stopping me. I soon realize it was Daisuke he was holding me tightly in his arms. The events of last night flood through my memory and my eyes begin to water. I felt so drained like I cried so much I didn't have anymore tears to cry I felt numb.

I lean into Daisuke's embrace his scent confronting me. He felt like my new safe place. His skin was so soft and warm. Wait where's his shirt? He had one on last night I guess he took it off. I'm not complaining though it was nice his chest felt strong but comfortable.

I look up at his face it was beautiful. I reach up and touch his chin his features were perfect. His lips were plump and pink I can't believe I was lucky enough to kissed them. His little nose was so cute it was a little red from sleeping,he even had a few light freckles that you could only see if you looked close enough,he looked so peaceful.

His hair was a mess but he was still able to pull it off. I reach my hand up and touch it his hair was so soft a fluffy. I play in it some more before he stops me.

"Good morning to you too."he chuckles his morning voice deep.

"Good morning."

I smile as he pushes my hair out of my face I know good and well my hair was a hot mess and I cannot pull it off like he did because I'm black.

"How do you feel."

I take a moment to think should I tell him how I'm really feeling? Or would he not understand and just dismiss me. I'm not use to putting my emotions out like that afraid of being misunderstood.

"It's okay you can tell me how you really feel I know yesterday was a lot for you." He reassures me

It's almost as if this man had telepathy he understands me with out me even saying anything.

"To be completely honest I feel numb."

"Why do you think that is?"

"I don't know everything I felt everything that happened, feels so hard to believe to the point that I'm exhausted I feel like I can't even cry anymore because I cried away all my tears. I don't even know if that makes sense." I ramble.

"I completely understand Nova don't worry it's normal for you to feel this way."He says giving me a kiss on the forehead.

His reassurance calmed me down but in the back of my my mind I still felt fear. Fear of what's to come, fear of confrontation, fear of everything.

"I'm going to go back and get your car today okay."

I nod remembering my car was still there.Then I remember my phone.I get up from his embrace and look at him.

"What's wrong?" He asks confused.

"My phone is still in the car."