𝒂𝒍𝒕𝒓𝒖𝒊𝒔𝒎 ✒︎ hajeongwoo

chapter 17

god dammit this was so hard for me to write. school's been kicking my ass real good. i'll add a song later.

Jeongwoo laid on his bed. Staring up at the ceiling with his set of blank thoughtless eyes. The sound of the wisps of warm air coming from his air conditioner and the distant bickering downstairs being the only sounds he was aware of . Barely aware of. After a long week of his mind thinking a million thoughts per second, it finally stopped. And Jeongwoo didn't know whether he should be happy and relieved or scared and cautious. He didn't know which emotion was most appropriate for the situation he found himself in.

He wondered what Haruto was doing right now. What his dad was doing. What the Watanabe sons of bitches were doing. But the thought that scared him the most was what his uncle was doing. Maybe he'd already figured it out and there was no use in trying anyway. Perhaps it would be better that way. Surrendering to whatever they were gonna do to him once they find out. Then he wouldn't have to do all the work to save his ass. He wouldn't have to plan secret meetings with Watanabe Haruto anymore and he wouldn't have to slave for something that might not even end up happening .

No. He shouldn't think like that. He snapped out of his trance and sat up on his bed. Looking down at his blanket that covered his legs. turning his head towards the black alarm clock to find the glowing numbers 1:09pm. He should've been out of bed by that time. But no matter how much he reminded himself that he needed to get up some time soon, he sunk deeper into the laziness that left him bed ridden ever since he woke up . What was there to do if he got up anyway? Slave for his uncle and fulfil his every demand? He's been around the house more often. Clear from the bickering downstairs. Sometimes Jeongwoo wondered if Taekwang even had a home of his own. Or if he got evicted. Or if the court withdrew his house away because of the crimes the mob committed. There must be some reason why he's been camping in his house for god knows how long.

Today marked the 4th day after he met up with Haruto at the train station. It also marked the 4th day of zero meetings and Haruto and Jeongwoo avoiding each other. The clock's been ticking while they sat there idle and clueless. He probably scared Haruto away by smoking weed as soon as he agreed to help him. Now that he thinks about it, what the hell were they bickering about downstairs? The fast, loud thoughts started the run through his mind again. He took a shaky breath in. Held it in for a few seconds. And let it out, just as shaky. A sigh left his lips as he laid back down on his back. His hands covered his face as he let out a series of tired groans.

"Hey Jeongwoo." A sudden voice came from his door. Jeongwoo sharply gasped and tensed up, lifting one of his hands from his eye to see who's at the door. Jiwon stood there looking at his with his brow furrowed slightly and a suspicious look in his eye.

Jeongwoo threw his head back on his pillow and rubbed his eyes, "ugh what do you want." He moaned in agony.

"We're having some pancaked downstairs, do you..want some?" He offered. Pancakes? What a joke. So all the bickering downstairs was happening while they were eating pancakes. Jiwon stood at the door waiting for his response.

"No I don't want goddamn pancakes, get out." He groaned, still rubbing his eyes until he saw colourful squiggles all around. Jiwon shook his head at Jeongwoo's behaviour and turned to close the door.