THE GHOST OF MY PAST(GP)

Chapter Five

Do I have to? Ella whines once I bring up the topic about the school shuttle bus. She doesnt like the idea of it for some reason. Maybe because I have always brought her to school myself since day one.

We, again, are now stuck at the intersection, waiting for our turn to get out of this horrendous traffic. If I said earlier I hated Monday, now Im starting to believe that Tuesday is no better.

Yeah, Ive been thinking about this. Im planning to take a train to work instead of driving there.

Ella takes a deep breath and sighs loudly. Such a drama queen she is. Does it mean I have to get up earlier?

Yeah.

She moans and grunts at my reply as if the world has turned against her completely.

Ella  hates waking up in the morning. She used to be an early bird, but since last year, shes developed a new unhealthy attachment to her bed. Waking her up is becoming a new chore to me. Well, she is my kid after all. I still remember how my mom used to prank me to get me out of my bed.

If I have to drop you first, we still have to start earlier anyway, so that I can catch the train on time. Im eyeing her in the rear-view mirror. It doesnt matter if I take you to school or if you go by bus, you will need to wake up earlier, sweetie. And the train station is closer to our home, its just more practical for you to go with the shuttle bus.

What if the kids in the same bus are mean? Marissa gets annoyed a lot by the boys in the same bus with her.

Have those kids done something to Marissa?

Well, they often bother her, like hiding her stuff or pulling her hair.

I frown. Hmm, has Marissa told her parents about this? Or maybe told the bus dispatcher?

Ella shrugs. I dont know.

She should. Tell her to.

Okay.

And dont worry, Im going to make sure you get the best shuttle bus with maximum control. I hit the accelerator once the traffic light turns green. But if other kids in the same bus try to bully you, you know what to do. Remember last summer when you fought the boy in your class? This is no different. But then you need to tell me right away.

But the headmaster said fighting is not good.

I bite my lower lip, thinking about how to answer her. True. If you can avoid it, then its better to stay clear from it. But if a boy hits you like last time, I permit you to hit him back. A boy should never hit a girl. I glance at my daughter who is listening to me religiously. I add, We should never hit anyone. But if they attack us first, then its okay to defend ourselves by attacking back. Do you understand?

Ella nods. Yes.

My daughters school finally comes into view. I slowly pull over several meters before the gate. When the car stops fully, I turn my head to watch her getting out of her seat booster. Well talk more about this tonight, okay?

Are you going to be at Aunt Hoyeons on time tonight?

Yes, I hope so.

Kay. See you tonight, Mama. She leans over to give me a peck before jumping out of the car.

Enjoy school!

Smiling, I watch her zigzagging towards her school gate. Her long brown hair dances in the air as the wind gusts through. Her small torso is hidden behind her polka-dot red backpack, making her look like a walking ladybug.

Ella was born lightweight. I remember how I blamed myself for that since I believed it was because of my alcohol consumption in my first trimester of pregnancy. Even though it wasnt intentional and the doctor didnt confirm it, the guilt refused to leave me for a very long time. Im just glad that she is starting to catch up with the average size of kids her age now.