mind over mask

twelve

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Marinette's POV

I hated Robin. Who was he to insult me, to insinuate I wasn't doing my best to protect Paris? 

But deep down, I knew he was right. I wasn't enough. My best wasn't enough. If I was, Hawkmoth would've been long gone by now. Maybe that's why I hated him so much, because he was honest.

How could I hate honesty, if I hated lying just the same? I knew it. I didn't want to admit it. I just hated feeling useless and broken.

But I still hated Lila more than I would ever hate Robin.

Making my way to school, I dreaded the fact that I would have to tell Adrien and Chloe the events of last night.

That the dreaded Black Mask from Gotham City was here in Paris, working with Hawkmoth.

"Mari? Are you okay?" Chloe asks me, as I come into her view.

I raise my guard again, it's been so long that I've worn my heart on my sleeve, and I guess Nightwing and Robin caught me off guard.

"I'm fine. But I have something to tell you and Adrien at lunch. It's important." I say, trying to not sound desperate at school of all places.

"How important?" She asks.

Using our code, I admit, "It'll take a miracle."

"What's this about a miracle?" Adrien asks, after he steps out of his limousine towards us. His smiling face dropped as he saw the seriousness on our own faces. "Bugaboo?" He whispered.

I glanced to the right, seeing Damian staring intently at our group. "I'll tell you at lunch. The roof."

They both nodded, and we walked into Francois-Dupont High School in silence, rather than our usual loudness.

I raced up the stairs, avoiding feet, whether they were trying to trip me intentional or not. Can't I just graduate already?

I sit in my seat, immediately sitting up straight. If I slouched over, I think I would fall back asleep. I don't know how I hadn't been late to school yet.

Damian sits next to me, pulling out two notebooks: one for studying and one for his own drawings.

Sitting next to Damian was nice. He never asked questions, and he never tried to pry into my life. His silence wasn't cold, it was a welcoming change.

And who knows, maybe this year would change. Maybe it could be better.

Mrs. Bustier droned on with her lesson, I asked to go to the bathroom, and escaped the classroom for a few minutes.

As soon as I closed the stall door behind me, Tikki flew out of my bag. "Marinette! Are you alright?" She asks, studying my face.

"Yeah Tikki. I'm fine. I just needed a breather." I answer her honestly. "Do you think—"

"Marinette," a high pitched voice echoes throughout the bathroom.

I feel the hairs on my arms and neck rise, and I feel a little pale, as I recognized the voice. I'd rather fight an akuma than deal with someone like Lila alone. I motion for Tikki to get back in the bag, and reluctantly, she does.

I could hide in here forever, but I'm tired of hiding in the shadows. Besides, it never turned physical. Lila led the class to destroy possessions of mine, or throw rude insults at me. They tried to trip me, yes, but they never touched me.

So, I let the stall door fling open, and I step into her eyesight. "Lila." I return with a dead tone. "What are you doing here?" Practicing her stalking skills, maybe?

"I told the teacher I was sooo concerned that you weren't feeling very well today, and so I humbly volunteered to come in and check on you." Lila proudly shows off her lie. But she's practically begging me to ask why she came, and not Chloe, or even somebody else.

I grit my teeth. She's trying to bait me, but I take it anyways, "What are you actually doing here?"

"Things don't have to be this way, Marinette. You can have your friends back if you want." Lila says, with a sinister smile.

I arch my eyebrow, waiting for the catch. She has to have another agenda to fulfill. It's not like she did anything out of the goodness of her heart.

She sighs, "Of course, you wouldn't me as popular as me. You just have to apologize, tell everyone you were wrong and jealous, and I'll make them forgive you. You can have Alya back, although, I don't know how you two were best friends in the first place. All she talks about is Ladybug and journaling, she literally has no personality—" Lila continues ranting, trying to persuade me.

For a moment I considered it. Her offer. It would be nice to have friends again. It would feel nice to be accepted.

But I couldn't admit that I was wrong, if I turned over to her side, I would validate all of her lies and enhance them. So why come to me now?

It clicked.

I was the last thorn in her side. If she got rid of me, she would win.

"No." I say adamantly.

Lila's face flickers in shock, she genuinely believes that I would take her offer. "What do you mean, no? All your suffering can be over, you just have to—"

"Let you manipulate me?" I step forward in confidence, "Yeah right Lila, even you couldn't believe such an outrageous lie like that."

"Come on Marinette," Lila steps closer, "Think about it. The offer stands until tomorrow. You take it, you'll finally be happy."

I roll my eyes.

Her eyes have a dangerous gleam when she says, "If you don't take it, imagine how much more miserable your life can become. I'll go tell Mrs. Bustier you're okay. Toodles!" She calls over her shoulder, making her point.

When she's out of sight, I let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding.

"Mari?" Tikki whispers, nibbling on a cookie.

"I'm fine. We have to get back to class." I close the purse, hiding my kwami from the rest of the world. I feel bad that I didn't even let her say anything, but I needed time to think on my own.

I close my eyes. You just have to finish this year, and then, you don't have to deal with anyone ever again, I promised myself.

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