mind over mask

eleven

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Damian's POV

I hated Ladybug. Who did she think she was?

I was pissed off, she was one of the very few who had ever caught me off guard. I'll admit, she's smarter and stronger than I thought... who was I kidding? I hated her because she was almost as good as me, and thanks to Grayson's interference, she had little to no training. I'll blame her magical powers before ever admiring—no, admitting her skill.

I raced Grayson back to our shared apartment, stripped off my uniform, and showered under burning hot water. My muscles were tense, and I couldn't relax. But it gave me time to think about the day's events.

How I had been saved by Marinette this morning.

How I called her Angel, of all things.

How mesmerized I had been watching Ladybug fight the akuma.

Ladybug knew French, English, as well as Arabic, which meant she was very smart. She still had to be a teenager, perhaps an early adult, but she was small, so I would imagine she was still in school.

Which only confirmed my beliefs that she attended Francois-Dupont High School. I needed to figure Ladybug's identity before it consumed me. I didn't even care about the rest of her partners. I needed to know—

"Woah there little D. Why are you glaring into your phone? Did Jason send you another video of Alfred and Titus without you?" Grayson jokes, and I don't appreciate it, so my glaring turns to him.

I was so deep in my own thoughts, I hadn't even realized I was staring so intently into the phone.

"No. It's nothing." I all but growl. It was true that out of all my brothers, I was the closest to Grayson. He could pick apart my feelings and actions within seconds. That being said, he could get on my nerves as easily as anyone else. Except Drake. His existence bothered me in general.

Stupidly, Grayson opens his mouth again, "Is it because you were practically dangling from that streetlight for a good five minutes tonight?"

"You repeat that incident to anyone else, and I will make sure that Kor'i finds out that chocolate milk doesn't actually come from chocolate cows." I threaten.

"You take that back right now," Grayson proclaims dramatically. It would be devastating to the alien, but Grayson would always protect her from a cruel world. Their relationship sickened me, the way they were hopelessly in love with each other... it was a weakness. Love was a weakness.

"Then you won't tell a single soul." I affirmed.

"Deal," he groans. "Man, I was about to call Jason and it would've been so funny to see the look on his face when he found out what happened."

I scoff, "I will not become another form of your and Jason's amusements as Brown and Drake have."

"Oh come on, we're just having a little bit of fun with them because they're trying to hide the fact that they're dating. Why, you don't think when you find a girl we won't tease you guys the same way?" Grayson smirks.

I didn't view love the same way as all my brothers did. Grayson had Kor'i, Jason was enjoying his adult life, and Drake had Brown. Even my Father had Selina. I was more wary about the things that concerned my heart. You trust someone with the key to your heart, and they could just as easily take you down with it.

Look at my Mother, and how that turned out.

Without her actions, I wouldn't be here, but it disgusted me. That's why I had to prove my worth, to prove that I was worthy of Robin and of being a family. But it was still hard to undo habits that I had learned at the League of Assassins since birth.

I promised myself that when I had realized Mother and Grandfather's intentions weren't as noble as they pretended to be, that I would never be like them ever again.

Rolling my eyes, and crossing my arms, I try to steer the conversation elsewhere. Grayson was easily distracted anyways, "We're not talking about this right now. We're going to focus on the mission at hand. What are we going to do about Ladybug?"

"Damian, it's okay to take a break from the mission. You're allowed to relax and be yourself." He prompts me.

I don't know how to be myself. I've always been a puppet for somebody else.

I only enjoyed painting, patrol, and my pets. I hadn't tried to get out of my comfort zone, for the fear of failure. I couldn't fail with so much on the line for me.

"What would Father say about that?" I retort.

"Batman or Bruce Wayne?" Grayson sighs.

I glare.

Grayson continues, "He would say that the mission comes first. But you're still a teenager, and your mental health should come first. If it doesn't, we can't watch you destroy yourself."

Like Jason did, is the unspoken words that hang in the air. But Grayson doesn't understand that since already destroyed myself.

I'm a murderer.

I'm an Al Ghul.

I can't change those facts, no matter how hard I try to run away from my past.

"Fine. But we still need to stop the Black Mask before he can wreak more havoc." I relent, because if I don't, Grayson will try to convince me for hours. Time we didn't have.

"Deal. So back to ladybug. I think we should go after her again, but this time, not follow her around. We need to earn her trust." Grayson hypothesizes.

"I disagree. She'll come to us." I analyze her actions and decisions when we cornered her.

Grayson looks confused, "What makes you say that?"

"We insulted her, by saying she wasn't enough to protect her city. Imagine if someone did that to us in Gotham. And Hawkmoth has been terrorizing this place for about three years, it's going to eat away at her, especially with the appearance of the Black Mask. She'll come to us for help, she has an obligation to protect her city."

"You're right. Well, you better go to bed, you have school in the morning. Oh! And I'm working late tomorrow, I got called in for an extra shift." Grayson says. Being a detective suits the golden boy.

"I'll walk home then." I say. It would save time and effort.

Grayson chuckles, "You, Damian Wayne, walk home? No, just stay at school until I pick you up. That way you're not stuck in our apartment 24/7 and go stir crazy. Besides, with Hawkmoth and the Black Mask on the loose, it's better not to be alone." Grayson explains.

"Fine."

I couldn't wait to get this mission over with.

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