City of Dreams

17.

Is happiness a sort of blissful state of mind or just a kind of surreal propensity? It may be hard to recognize its very nature if we remain guilelessly confined in a state of woeful unawareness or in a no-man's-land of emotions. In their dogged and obstinate quest for the zenith of happiness, many forget to take pleasure in the small things of everyday and, thus, become disgruntled and depressed instead, which leads them to a mire of gloom.

***

"Naaz, did you get the call from Music company?" Karou asked.

"Nahi... kyun? Did you get a call?" she asked. It's been a week that her father left for Delhi. She has been feeling a little low after he left for couple of days but then her work kept her busy. She was expecting a call from the music company which she had given the audition and no response from them was making her dispirited.

"Yes, just now... isiliye toh pooch raha huin. They have called me to the studio tomorrow to record a song. Chorus nahi... a full-fledged song! Man, I am so excited!"

"Oh!! Mujhe kyun nahi aaya?" she said with a dejected look.

"Aa jayega... tu toh mere se bhi acha gaati hain. Muh mat sada apna, mujhe congratulate toh kar!" he said patting her shoulder.

With a frowny face she wished for him, but she was having a sinking feeling of failed attempts throughout the last year for a single, solo chance in this singing field. The chorus, jingles, even a backup vocalist for groups, events, were not enough for her now. Though it did give her enough regular earnings, she wanted recognition, an identification in this field, a name which everyone will acknowledge in the field of singing.

The mobile ringer distracted her from depressed thoughts. It was Sidharth... He was in Gujarat for the last three days for some mall opening events and the Cricket field inauguration. Since the time his comeback was announced he has been busy with auditions, events, meetings. She was happy for him... Even on the day when they had planned for an outing with her dad and his nieces, he got a call from his manager for a story-telling meeting, and he had to leave. Though his presence was missed, they enjoyed a lot touring around Mumbai roads and iconic places to visit and eat. He did join them later at night for dinner which he had arranged in some new restaurant his friends recommended.

She picked up the video call with a plastic smile, "Hi"

Sidharth knew in that instant that she was not herself, "Kya hua? Itna ruka suka hi? Yeh kaise smile hain teri? I am seeing it for the first time, so fake! Kissi ne kuch kahan kya? Tere Bapu ne..."

"Nahi na Sidharthhh... jab dekho Papa hi reason hotey hain kya meri off moods ke... Bechare ab toh itne pyaar se baat karthey hain mere se... Tum na please yeh Bapu Bapu karna band karo... what is this? Papa hain woh mere!" she growled, venting out all her frustrations at him.

"Oh, baba re! Itna gussa... kya bolti hain tu... Kuch toh gadbad hain...haan... kuch toh gadbad hain yahan..."

She didn't react and placed the mobile on the pile of clothes she had folded on the bed and continued her work folding other clothes. It was almost 7pm, she was feeling tired mentally and physically and besides everything she was also missing him and now no response from the music company was making her grumpier.

"Ho gaya aaj ka event? Koi cricketer aaya kya, someone known?" she asked to change the topic from her to him.

"Ho gaya sab... bas dinner ke liye ready ho raha huin with few Cricket board members... ya I saw few of them. Pictures bhi liye, I will send it to you. Tu batana kon hain... let me see if you know anyone" looking at the mirror he reversed the camera to show her his full profile. "How am I looking? Formal dinner hain so shirt pehna hain, coat pehnu kya? Too much toh nahi ho jayega?" spraying some perfume on his light blue shirt he asked.