Marina Oneshot Book

Bigger Than the Whole Sky

No words appear before me in the aftermath

Salt streams out my eyes and into my ears

Every single thing I touch becomes sick with sadness

'Cause it's all over now, all out to sea

"Maya, we need your help with the funeral arrangements."

Huh. Funeral. The words nobody wants to hear.

Andy walked over to where Maya was standing by the window, just staring into space. She knew it'd been hard, but it's been a month and they couldn't do anything to fix the past. All Andy could do was be there for her best friend and her wife.

Maya knew why Andy was here today. One month. An entire month without him. It hurt Maya to know how much she and Carina were missing out on. But instead of letting herself grieve, she helped Carina through her grief. This was even worse than when her brother, Andrew, died.

"Huh?" Maya asked, turning to face Andy.

"The arrangements. Have you and Carina figured anything out yet?"

Maya sighed. It had been hard to get Carina to talk, let alone look at Maya without crying. The resemblance was too much for her and she wasn't taking care of herself, which is why Maya threw herself into helping Carina as much as she'd let her. "No. I know you need an answer, but Carina needs to help with this decision."

"I know. Is there anything specific you want?"

"I just want him to know how much we love him," Maya sobbed. "It's not fair, Andy. He was supposed to grow up and live a long life. It's not fair!"

Andy put down her clipboard and hugged Maya, who continued to cry into her shoulder. The always strong firefighter had finally broken down. But for good reason. "I know, Maya, I know. I'm so sorry you don't get that chance with him."

Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye

You were bigger than the whole sky

You were more than just a short time

And I've got a lot to pine about

I've got a lot to live without

I'm never gonna meet

What could've been, would've been

What should've been you

What could've been, would've been you

"What can you imagine of him?" Andy asked Maya and Carina as they sat cuddled together on their sofa. It was a quiet night and only Vic and Andy were at their house. They were supposed to finish the funeral preparations, but they all got sidetracked. "What do you think he'd be like?"

"Stubborn, for sure," Maya chuckled. "He'd speak Italian and love cooking, just like his Mama."

Carina smiled through the tears shining through. "He'd have blue eyes as blue as the ocean, like Maya's. And a love for running. He and Maya would go running together, starting with him in the stroller."

"But I wouldn't push him like my dad pushed me. He deserves everything good in the world."

Andy and Vic smiled. They were glad to see even a faint smile on their friends' faces, since the aftermath was so traumatic and pulled both Carina and Maya into their own emotional shutdowns.

"Would he have been a firefighter or doctor?" Vic asked. "Maybe neither?"

"He could've been whatever his dreams told him," Maya said. She hadn't let go of Carina's hand the entire time Andy and Vic were there, but it was comforting for both of them. When talking about this subject, Maya knew Carina would clam up. It was only normal.