Hedgehog

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23rd December 2022


Dear Chainsaw,

27th July 2016. That's when everything changed.

I had a tournament in Bangkok on 28th July 2016. My parents and I had decided to drive a day earlier and stay the night there so everything goes smoothly the next day.

It wasn't anything new. We used to do this for almost every tournament.

We were supposed to leave in the afternoon—plans were to reach there in the daylight as it was an ongoing monsoon. It would have been harder to drive after the sun had set. But it started raining heavily in the afternoon so we decided to wait until the pouring slowed down.

We left home by Seven in the evening. Already three hours later than planned. The drive to Bangkok was more or less two hours long.

Everything was going just as usual. We had the evening news playing on the car stereo. Dad was driving, mom was in the passenger seat and I was at the back.

It had gotten dark. Rain had started pouring heavily again. Windshields were going back and forth. Dad was driving slowly and cautiously. I remember having my head against the cool window. I had earphones on and was watching a clip of one of my matches. The last one I won. I always analysed my previous matches before the D-Day.

Dad asked me to not strain my eyes and rest instead. He knew staring at the screen in a moving car always gave me a headache.

Mom passed me a candy like she always did whenever she saw me getting agitated or anxious. It helped me calm my nerves.

I wasn't focusing on the road but the roads were familiar to me. We had driven past it enough times. Suddenly, the car drifted a bit and I jerked to the side.

Sorry. That dumbass was driving with his headlights off, Dad informed us and asked if we were alright. We were. I was just glad that we didn't get into any accident. I remember sighing a relief.

This had pulled away my focus. Now I was paying attention to the road. The roads were mostly free of traffic. It was a green light for the left turn on the signal at the intersection. Dad was about to turn left. No vehicle was supposed to come from the front.

A speeding minivan approached our way from the front lane. I heard mom scream before I even felt the impact. The van T-boned our car. Everything spun. I flew to the other side of the car when the impact threw the car off the track, hit the curb, and stopped.

The car door crumpled and the metal punctured on the other side. I saw my parents. Dad was sprawled disoriented, his head hanging low to the side. The seatbelt was holding his body up. He looked unconscious. I could not see my mom. I was right behind her seat. It wasn't until I tried to see her did I realise that I was incapable of moving. My head was getting heavy and my legs felt numb. My breathing was strained. I was forcing myself to stay conscious.

From the broken window, I could see a few people outside. From the corner space of the seat, I saw my mom's hands hanging. I tried to speak. I don't remember if I made any sound though. I tried to reach my parents to touch them, but I couldn't.

I don't know how many seconds, minutes or hours had passed. I finally heard the sound of ambulances. I could hear multiple sirens. That is all I remembered before everything got dark.

I woke up later to the bright lights of an emergency room and passed out again. I had life-threatening injuries. I went through multiple surgeries. Suffered a stroke due to blood flow disruption in my brain. I needed resuscitation. I had lacerated kidneys, a liver injury, fractured ribs, shattered pelvis. I wasn't even on the side of direct impact.

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