LOST BUT FOUND
I rememer i was lost, still
after writing this.
I didnt win i just gave my story a happy ending
i was still trapped in the cycle.
I just had a way of poeticizing sick feelings
Romanticizing trauma.
Making my darkness something pretty that i can look at
I remember when i came to the end of myself, my strength, my sence
But i also remember when i found the light
and everything changed
where I used to feel empty, ..He filled me up.
This whole time the void in me was his throne.
His place in my life.
All my searching was done
It felt like coming home.
Now I never feel alone.
He compensated for everything I lacked.
He filled all the gaps
in unexplainable ways I never feel unloved.
I remember when nothing was ever enough.
He is enough and that is enough.
i can't tell you how enough it feels, i feel
where the future was grim and I felt helpless.
I have hope. tangible hope
blinding hope. hope so bright
Outweighing the dark
Heavy hope. unreasonable hope
I held on to Him and he never let me slip
He gave me assurance that I cannot quite place.
peace beyond my understanding
I dont know alot of things but I know all things are working for my good.
I'm guaranteed that my future is in a safe place
I felt security. He was solid in a way nothing ever was.
Nomatter what takes place ill be quite alright.
and where am I getting this guarantee? He promised me and He doesnt go back on it.
My guarantor
i remember I asked to know him. I demanded for answers
I said I have to know you before i come to meet you.
and I set out to do so.
looking for clues
Reading the bible
saying silent prayers in my heart and soul
as if they were private conversations
genuine one on one. no filters
I asked all my questions. I searched online and I looked for the people who already knew him.
step by step he drew me out of the dark.
He revealed things that were always there only if you searched.
only if you asked
I was always looking for the light.
This whole time I just had to open my eyes.
I turned around and so many of us were in the dark
in our own private hells, private invisible cells,
cycles that never break. shackles that never stop holding us back
in pieces, on our knees, about to quit.
trying to fight battles we never win
on our own
when the war is already won
I know you're trying to find the light
I know your putting up a fight
I pray He Opens your eyes
I pray you encounter your centerpiece
In all his glory and all that He is
