Three Blonde Wishes

Chapter 19 - Love II

Atif

Loving someone can never be a mistake.

I crossed my hands over my stomach and laughed at Drevis's joke. Drevis was being extra hilarious. I laughed so much and so hard after so long. I missed going to work and missed catching up with him during our breaks. I didn't know how much I missed my work life until this party happened. Somehow my eyes met Aarzoo who was standing across the room. I noticed how she was lost looking at me. The moment I looked at her, she smiled at me. My laugh disappeared. I was lost in her eyes. I exhaled deeply, looked at her, and smiled back. The room was chaotic, Drevis kept talking and everyone around kept laughing but suddenly everything was mute for me. All the people were blurred except her. Both our smiles faded. There was something more that took over the gaze. I walked over to her while still looking at her. I was now standing in front of her. Admiring her beauty from closer. Her skin glittered as the lights shone on her. Her big beautiful black eyes were hypnotizing. It was hard for me to focus on anything except her at that moment. Her lips shone with her lip gloss.

She held my hand and we walked towards the staircase where there was no one and I pinned her on the wall. Her eyes gazed into mine without any hesitation. I tucked her hair behind her ears and slid my index finger on her cheek gently. She brushed her hands on my arm all the way to my shoulders and hugged me. It felt like my heart was going to pound out of my chest. I stayed still in shock without moving.

'Atif' she whispered. Without knowing what to say I responded with a 'Hmm?'

'Did you ever...love me?' She asked. Her question hit me like a truck. This was a question that I was running away from. She asked me something that I feared to ask myself.

She unwrapped her arms and looked at me. She repeated her question looking into my eyes this time.

'Did you ever love me?'

A hopeless smile took over my lips.

'It would be wrong if I say yes, and it would be a lie if I say no.'

'What do I say?' I asked her.

Now she had the same hopeless smile on her lips as well. She raised her hand and placed her palm on my cheek and caressed my beard with her thumb. I closed my eyes as I felt her cold hands on my warm cheek. It was weirdly comforting. I wished to stay just like that. She continued to brush my cheek with her thumb and continued to smile at me. I smiled back at her. She then got close to me and embraced me in her arms again. I felt gentleness in her hug. She wrapped her arms around my shoulder and caressed the back of my head gently. Her fingers brushed through my hair and I exhaled realizing what I have missed. Tears started filling my eyes. I held her back tight and blinked my tears away. I pulled her closer to me and hugged her tight. I wrapped both my arms around her waist and buried my face in her shoulder.

I regretted the day I asked for a divorce from her. I wish I had never told her anything that day. I wish I had walked out of the door quietly and patiently that day. I wish I let her complete that cup of coffee peacefully that day. If only I was a bit more patient, all this wouldn't have happened. I hugged her tighter as these thoughts rushed nonstop in my mind.

I wished to stay like that for as long as I could. I wanted to scream out of all the rage that I had for myself but I couldn't. Instead, I stayed there, hugging her tight. Praying every second that passed by that it stayed just a little longer. But I was wrong. The moment didn't stay any longer as she unwrapped her arm. I held her hand but I lost the grip as she walked away from me. It was at that moment I realized I was in love. I was madly, deeply in love with this woman. And above that all, I was hopelessly in love with her.

~

The party was on and I met more of my friends and professionals from the same field. It was great that I could expand my knowledge and contacts at this party. The doctor in me was extremely happy that day because I was about to resume my work. I waited for this day for a very long time.

'So, how you feeling man?' Drevis asked as I got free for a moment. 'I'm loving it Doc. Thanks!' I exclaimed as we jotted hands and went for a hug. He patted my back and said 'Anything for you!' to which I responded with a grateful smile.

'So how're things with Aarzoo?' He asked.

'No luck? Still the same?' He asked. I nodded after a long pause.

'The sooner you tell your family and friends, the better it would be.' He said taking a sip from his glass.

'How's her work going?' He quickly changed the question. 'Pretty much great! She's having fun.' I responded.

'I'm sure she is' he chuckled immediately agreeing with me.

'Farris is liking her company' He added. I smiled and agreed. 'Farris is a nice man...'

'Very stubborn, he likes things his way, could be scary when it comes to work...'

'Looks like Aarzoo is carrying things well with him'

'He is a great man' He added while talking about him. I looked at him trying to comprehend why exactly we were having this conversation.

'Yeah, so my point is, don't worry about Aarzoo when she's with Farris' He said patting my back again almost like he heard my mind voice.

'So tell me more about this man' I told Drevis.

'Is he married?' I asked.

'He lost his wife' Drevis replied. 

'Lost?'.

'I'm sorry I didn't quite get you' I asked for more clarity.

'His wife committed suicide a couple of years ago. It's a heart wrecking incident...' He started to speak but was intervened by somebody. He left me to my perplexity and walked away greeting the guest.

It was then I heard Aarzoo's laughter. She was hidden behind the pillar and I took two steps sideways to get a better view of her. I adored her as this was one of the first few times she looked happy. Very happy that it instantly made me happier. I continued to take a few more steps sideways and that's when I saw Farris. It was Farris that she was talking to. She was in Farris's company. Her eyes met mine. She raised both her eyebrows at me still having a smile on her face. I smiled back and gestured saying 'nothing'

Farris looked at me as well. He smiled at me. I smiled back formally. I moved my gaze back to her and watched her quietly taking a sip from my glass. It was a mere blessing to watch her be happy. I was the happiest man on earth seeing her happy. But I wondered, who was the reason behind her happiness? Was it me? Or was there someone else behind her happiness? I thought to myself as my gaze moved to Farris.