Misfits (#2)

42.

Everest.

Ria's always been a lover of the dark, of all things that encompass darkness. I guess it makes sense that she fell in love with Luca Hernandez, the darkest of us all. I've always thought the night to be too quiet, too vast and unpredictable.

I sit on the balcony of our apartment and flick my gaze over the sky. The NYC skyline drowns out the stars so it's just blackness up there. I hate quiet but I try, in this moment, to enjoy it. Violet's always liked it so I remember the way we had sat on the balcony of that auditorium, her hands over my eyes.

Silence had relaxed me then. But I think that was just Violet's presence. I don't like silence unless it's with her there too.

The balcony doors slide open and Hudson walks out. I look out to the view and take the cigarette he offers to me, quiet around us for a minute.

We've been in the new apartment for a few weeks now. It's a lavish place to live, more than any of us are used to but we're definitely not complaining. Amelia and Micah had insisted. And behind it all, it was Luca's scheme. He'd made sure we got this apartment so we'd be okay, so Ria and Benji would be.

I want to kill him myself. I want him back. Fucker. Motherfucker.

"Looking murderous weirdly suits you." Hudson perches his elbows on the balcony. He tosses the lighter to me.

"I think you just naturally find me sexy." I try to loosen my shoulders.

Hudson's lips quirk, "You wish, babe."

A small smile plays at my lips. Hudson's jaw sharpens as he takes another drag, smoke slowly gliding over his shoulder. His back's to me so I can't make out his face but he's getting a little healthier. Once Ria insisted that he stay with us here in New York, she doesn't let him near any drugs.

He's getting better. Somebody else has helped a lot with that.

"Are you in love with Val?" I ask bluntly.

He chokes on his cigarette.

I light my own, smirking when he turns his head to glare at me. He's still coughing when he stares at me accusingly, "No. Are you fucking stupid?"

"You're such a little whore, Hud. Hopping from one best friend to the next." I quip and he looks seconds away from punching me. I grin, "Kidding. You'd only be a homie hopper if Ria loved you back. Sucks to suck."

"Fuck off." He shakes his head, fighting a smile when he looks back out to the view.

I tilt my head back to blow out the thick smoke, "You're lying to yourself if you think you don't care about her. You never looked at Ria like you look at Valencia."

"Get off my back." He snips, "Half of our conversations are made up of arguing. That ball of sunshine gets on my fucking nerves."

I roll my eyes, "Whatever. You and Luca are the same. He was clueless too."

"And you're such a genius?" He turns so he's facing me.

I smile, "I'm whipped as fuck, for a girl who is way too good for me. I must be some sort of genius."

Hudson's expression sobers slightly at that. Any mention of Violet does that, though he hasn't outright shown any disdain. It's confusing as fuck. He looks away and takes a last drag of his cig, crushing it underneath his boot.

"Are you in love with her?" He spins it back on me, those dark blue eyes meeting mine.

"Deathly." I blow out smoke. I don't give a fuck what his deal is. I speak my mind and that's the truest it can get, "You've known from the beginning."