Love Fools Series #1: A Deal to Fall In Love

Chapter 17: Home Sweet Home

FIVE YEARS LATER

"Honey, wake up! We're here"

Marahan ko'ng tinapik-tapik ang pisngi ni Marco para gisingin siya. Dahan-dahan naman siyang nagmulat ng mata at kumusot-kusot pa. Nagtatakang iginala niya ang mata sa labas ng eroplano na kakalapag lang.

"Where are we Mommy? What is this place?"

Inosenteng tanong niya. I smiled at him habang hawak-hawak ko siya at inaalalayan pababa ng eroplano.

"We're in the Philippines honey. This is our home"

Iginala ko ang mata ko sa mga taong nag-aabang ng kani-kanilang mga kamag-anak. Agad kong nakita sina Mommy at Daddy sa di kalayuan na mabilis namang naglakad papunta sa amin.

It's been five years since I left the country to fix my life. Seeing the surroundings excites me as well as making me nervous. Five years was long enough for me to settle my life. It wasn't easy to live alone, far from my family but I made it, I survived.

Five years ago, I left the country to fix myself, to forget the things that caused me pain and to move on. At sa tingin ko naman ay nagawa ko na. Lumayo ako maging sa mga taong malapit sa akin, even Yssa. I did not contacted her because I didn't want to hear stories about things. Pero last month ay kinausap ko na rin siya, I apologized for not having communication with her for the past four years and she understood. I also told her that I'm finally going home.

Sa limang taong lumipas ay marami din ang nagbago sa akin. Naging mature na ako, of course, I had to be dahil nanay na ako. Narealize ko din na mahirap magbigay ng tiwala. Parang ayoko nang pagkatiwalaan pa lahat ng lalaki dahil alam kong parehas lang ang liko ng mga bituka nila.

Kahit nasa States ay marami din ang nagtangkang manligaw sa akin but I never gave anyone a chance. Wala akong panahon para sa mga ganyang kalokohan. I was too busy raising my son and studying. I realized how important my education is and being a mother was never a hindrance.

May mga panahon na bigla na lang akong nalulungkot at naiiyak. Iniisip ko kung ano bang kasalanan ang nagawa ko at bakit nangyari sa akin ang mga bagay na yon. Nevertheless, hindi ko pinagsisisihang nabuntis ako. My son is very adorable and sweet. But everytime I look at him, I remember his father. He looks exactly like his father. He got his eyes and nose. Almost everything.

***********

The drive towards home was quiet. I didn't feel like talking either. Hindi ko namalayang nakatulog pala kami ni Marco sa biyahe. Ibinaba na ni Dad ang mga gamit namin at idineretso sa kwarto ko. Pagpasok namin sa loob ay may nakahandang pananghalian. Dahil sa gutom at pagod ay dumiretso na kami sa hapag-kainan para kumain. Kasabay namin sina Mommy at Daddy na busy sa pakikipag-usap kay Marco. He's smart. I can't help but smile habang pinagmamasdan ko sila.

"Kamusta ka na hija?"

I looked at Dad before I answered him.

"I'm fine Dad, how about you? Grabe namiss ko ang Pilipinas!"

"It's good that you're back to your old self."

Malungkot lang akong napangiti.

"It's been five years Dad. And that five years has taught me a lot. I don't know if I am still the old me. But one thing is for sure. I've learned. I learned that life sometimes is cruel and playful. But nonetheless, I have learned. And that's what matters."

Tumayo ako at nagpaalam kay Dad na matutulog muna. Inakay ko si Marco patungo sa kwarto namin. Dala ng pagod, antok at jetlag, agad kaming nakatulog.