Tour Guide ➣ Carl Grimes

27. How It Ends

Hannah didn't know how many days it had been since she left the gun shed. Their home. She had wondered for what felt like months, and it very well might have been. She didn't know where she was going and she didn't know if she cared. Without the warmth of her mother and the security of her father, Hannah was left with nothing. She was nothing. Hannah was just a small speck floating through the deep woods, burying herself in thick grass when the monsters came by. All she ever did was move and hide. Move and hide. Over and over. She had never felt more alone.

Hannah slept when she could, which wasn't often. She could feel the rough bark on her back, digging at her spine as she tried to get comfortable. That night Hannah had finally found a place to settle, to try and rest. She had kept her eyes closed as the sun went down, gripping a knife over her chest. But she never fell asleep, not really. Each branch that snapped, every creature that darted by, forced her to stay alert. Hannah had never been so tired.

The grumbling of her stomach was what had finally forced her to move from her spot by the tree. She grabbed her bag, brushing off the dead leaves that had drifted on top of it, and pulled it over her shoulder. Hannah decided she had been out here for at least two months, though she could only base that on the routine she had kept. When she could feel the sun come up, Hannah would leave wherever she had stayed that night, not wanting to be in one place too long, and move on to find her next home. Sometimes, she would go far, maybe finding an abandoned shelter before the sun went down. Other times, she would only make it a mile before darkness enveloped the sky. That was her day. Every day.

Hannah hoped she would find a more comfortable place today. The sun was high in the sky, telling the girl she would have time to get at least a couple of miles in before the sun went down. As she walked through the thick woods, occasionally stumbling over branches, Hannah's stomach continued to growl. God, she was hungry. The path she had been following ended eventually, letting her out onto the road. She didn't like traveling that openly, but Hannah still found herself stepping onto the warm pavement, its heat burning through her shoes. She walked past the occasional abandoned car, frantically stabbing at the monsters that were still left inside, before rummaging around to see if she could find anything useful. When she couldn't Hannah only continued to walk.

It didn't catch her eye immediately. She almost walked right by it. It wasn't the blood that made her stop or the matted fur. Instead, it was the shiny bell that hung off of its neck. Off of its collar. The cat was so big. That was all Hannah could think about. She had looked around before walking up to it, checking that there were no monsters behind her. She couldn't look as her knife dragged through its stomach, the flesh thicker than Hannah had imagined. It was already dead, she told herself. Hannah cried when she'd finished it, her tears mixing with the blood it had left on her face. She couldn't pinpoint what had triggered the emotions. She felt so evil. She had just torn up a living thing, pulling at its insides for her own benefit. She couldn't bare to read the name she knew would be on the collar. It was someone's pet, someone's friend. And yet, her tears had also turned desperate as her stomach began to growl once again. Hannah looked at what she had done, at the blood on her hands, and still found herself wanting more. She was greedy and she was evil. Hannah was just like the monsters. 

Her vision was blurry as the tears fell. All she could see were bursts of dull greens and fiery reds. Hannah's head began to hurt with each heaving sob she let out. She wanted her mom. She wanted her dad. She wanted things to be as they had been so long ago. Hannah cried and cried until a soft whistling sound appeared, engulfing everything around her. She didn't know the tune it was singing, something just on the line between eerie and comforting. It seemed to grow louder and louder, piercing her ears. It screamed at her. And then it stopped.

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Hannah woke with a shout, her forehead damp with a layer of sweat and grime. She sat up, pulling at a woolen blanket draped across her up higher to her chest. She hadn't dreamt like that in a long time. She didn't even know she remembered what it was like outside. Before she got to Alexandria. She wasn't sure if the things she had dreamed were in fact real or just that, dreams. Hannah didn't want to know.