BLACK ROSE

Nice to meet you

Ashley. 

I might've been desperate enough to agree to this idea. I considered myself to be better at it, apparently I misunderstood my own despair.

Is my despair coming from the worry of never making more friends or from a deep curious feeling to get closer with Mae, I wonder. Maybe she spiked a completely new desire in me – to find a boyfriend. It seems that I'm losing the ability to understand myself.

After another hour of just throwing pieces of clothes out of my closet and on my bed, I just want to scream at the top of my lungs and disappear into thin air. Every time I remind myself of my promise. I've been raised to keep my promises and a little breakdown isn't going to make me break it.

"Someone's really desperate, huh?"

I jump at the sound of Mae's voice. Only then do I realise how late I am.

"Remember, you told me to meet you here." I just nod. "Oh boy, we have to make you ready."

She's fully dressed and looks absolutely gorgeous in a suede pink skirt and a long sleeved black see through shirt, with her big pink curly hair on full display and makeup that brings out her emerald, green eyes. I look like a mess compared to her, still in my oversized clothes and frizzy hair.

"Sit down." I do as she says. My eyes close for a second, feeling heavier than five minutes ago. A sudden wave of sleepiness embraces me. Mae leaves my room for a minute. I consider going after her, but instead decide to take a quick nap. She comes back with a cup of green tea.

"Thanks," I say with a smile.

She picks out a simple black tight dress, saying nothing can go wrong with black dress. It was my backup option from the moment I opened my closet. She fixes my hair, straightening it and adding some shiny oil to it. A simple dress with a simple hairstyle followed by a simple makeup.

"Heavy makeup just isn't for you." She finishes her masterpiece. Compared to her visible eyeshadows she really kept mine simple. Before we leave I grab a denim jacket and my already prepared little crossbody purse, where I, of course, didn't forget to pack my artificial source of deadly happiness.

********

"Who's party is it anyway?" I ask in the car.

"Good question." What?! "A friend of a friend of a friend of a friend of mine told a friend of mine about it and well... yeah, it's a party, you just roll with it."

You just roll with it? I've already picked up that she's a bit crazy, but this is a little too much even for her.

"So you don't even know who's hosting it?"

"Yes and no." I look at her with a big fat question mark in my eyes. "I know the people hosting it, and the people who told other people about it, if that's what you're asking."

Does she always speak this complicated? "How well do you know the people hosting it?"

She obviously has no problem going to a party where she knows no one. She might have been born in New York and knows this city by heart, but I'm new here.

"Sweetie, trust me a bit, won't you please?" I stare at her. She shakes her head before continuing. "I know them, but I wouldn't label us friends or acquaintances. We've talked at some parties; they aren't bad people."

Her words fail at calming me down, but I stop asking questions. I keep quiet and Mae starts to talk with Clark. She asks a bunch of questions, showing real interest in his answers. She's like a bright sunshine bringing a smile to everyone's face.