Cody Mitchell

14

Leah's POV

I just let her go...

I can't believe how utterly stupid I can be. Like seriously? What the hell am I doing? Why couldn't I just speak up and just reassure her and tell her the truth. I can't believe it. I just froze.

Tears stream down my face as I remember her words.

"I'm bad for you."

"You deserve someone better"

"Not someone who scares you"

"Not someone who could snap at any second and hurt you"

What does she mean she's bad for me? I get it she has demons and like a bad past or whatever but that doesn't mean she's bad for me. That doesn't mean she's going to hurt me.

Everyone has demons. Including me. All I want to do is help her through it. Through everything. Why couldn't I have just told her that?

I'm brought out of my thoughts when someone comes into the gym. I roll my eyes at the person not wanting to see her. Of course she just happens to be here right now.

I see her smirk drop when she sees my state. She is about to open her mouth but I stop her.

"No Jordan. Stop. Please. Just stop. I don't want you here and I'm definitely not in the mood right now. Please just leave me alone." I say, well kinda shout, but she doesn't move so I sigh and leave the room.

Luckily she seemed to get the message and didn't follow me out or pester me like she usually would. I think she knew that if she did anything I probably would've flipped and end up doing something stupid.

I start to walk down the hallway, overthinking like always, but then I get an idea. I get my phone out my pocket and call my best friend. It rings a few times then she picks up.

"Hey Le, what's up?" Keira says happily

"Ummm I messed up. What do I do? I'm such a shitty person Kei. What do I do?" I ramble out as tears start to roll down my cheeks again. I walk into the toilets and lock myself in a stall. I sit down and bring my knees to my chest.

"Hey. Hey. Slow down. You're alright. Breathe Le. What happened?"

"I-uh so I was in the meal room with the girls then I looked up to see Cody stood in the doorway and I felt so happy for a second but then I realised she wasn't smiling. She had uh puffy red eyes like she'd been crying but she looked emotionless, tired all at the same time. I panicked a bit and the girls saw her too then Cody left and I went after her. Then I found her in the gym and she was- uh she was punching the boxing bag and she looked pissed and her knuckles were bleeding and she had tears in her eyes. I couldn't watch it anymore so I pulled her away from it and then like out of reflex she-uh had her fist in my face and for a split second I was scared but I know she would never hurt me and then she hugged me and apologised but then she snapped again and started beating herself up about it. I tried to reassure her but then she started saying that she can't do this and she's sorry, that I deserve better not someone that will snap and hurt me. I just froze. I didn't stop her. I didn't reassure her. I just stood there and watched her leave." I cried out, breaking down again.

"Hey Le, calm down. Shhh, it's okay. Do you know where she went? If she's still at the training ground or what?" Keira asked trying to calm me down but get answers at the same time worried about the girl she sees like a sister.

"I-I-I don't know" I whispered guiltily

"Okay" she went silent for a minute. "Okay I'm going to get Lucy to call her and I'm going to get Beth to find you and I'll ask her to get the others to look for Cody okay?"