Lessons in love

chapter 3- breaking the ice

Waking up after having a whole day to reflect on the situation had definitely done joe some good. Waking up in his mums house, a place where his thoughts felt safe and manageable for the second day in a row now was doing him good. He was heartbroken and knew he messed up but he was feeling better.
He still hadn't revealed to his mum that him and dianne had made the decision to go their separate ways, the words haunting him. He knew it had to be said eventually but he wasn't ready, his mind battling with his words. It hurt too much to say she was no longer his girlfriend when he was still in love with her.

"Oh good morning"
Joe walked into the kitchen to the usual happy voice of his mother who despite not knowing the couple were no longer together had been told exactly what their argument was about. She however, just thought they were spending a few days apart to cool off and reflect on what had happened.

"Hey"
Joe spoke quietly still feeling sad about it all. He was breaking inside but didn't want to make a big deal of it.

"Are you ok?"
She asked and joe just silently nodded.

"Missing your girl?"

"Alot"
Joe's heart was aching knowing that he just couldn't just go back and see her. Despite that he knew he would have to see her at some point though and their paths would definitely cross. They were living in a world where they couldn't totally ignore eachother. They owned a house together which both of them would need to go to and with joe leaving without anything on him apart from his phone, he couldn't get into the house without the key dianne had and that would mean having to see her. It was needed though. They had to talk through everything that had happened.

"Maybe you should go back today, and say sorry to her"
Tracey suggested. But with her not knowing about the breakup this hit a nerve for joe. She was right though in a way. He did need to go back and say sorry, but not try to get back with her. She needed time and so did he.

"I cant. We need that space away from eachother mum"
Joe panicked a little not wanting to tell his mum just yet. He knew it would come out soon but he didn't want it to be now.

"But diannes a very forgiving girl Joseph and she loves you...alot. I know it's only been two days but maybe just apologise. Go back to the house and just say your sorry"
Tracey tried to persuade him and even though she was right the thought of seeing dianne was scary. He knew had had broken her heart but also broken his own in the process. She had told him they were no longer together but there was also a chance of getting back together if they found their way back to one another which could be interpreted as they were on a break. He was heartbroken and confused. But then again that was a reason to see her. To talk things through.

"I said some really bad things mum. I really really hurt her. Saying sorry isn't as simple as it sounds"
He tried to explain.

"But...."

"Mum I've broken both of our hearts and a whole lot more by saying what I said, it's going to take alot of time to get back to what we were. A sorry wont cut it"
Joe had told his mum about the argument knowing that what he said about dianne cheating on him was completely inappropriate. He knew it wasn't true or funny and he regretted it. But he hadn't told tracey how bad it was in terms of the break up of course but also when he grabbed her, hurting her wrist and also her throwing things out of anger.

"I'm sure she'll appreciate it though"

"Not at the moment"
He sighed wishing it was that simple.

"Maybe you could try"

"We're not together anymore mum"
Traceys whole face quite literally dropped in that moment but she remained silent, the shock building up inside of her. She thought this was just a small argument that could be resolved in a few days so to hear this, it was a huge shock.
Joe didn't want to say it now or in this way but with tracey pushing him to apologise he had to say something.