Nothing Ever Lasts Forever | BOOK 1 ✔️

9 | Wasted

TW: suicidal talk, heavy drinking, underage drinking, drunk talk, drug use, and shit caused by the other things.

Kiara

I woke up feeling sick. Like knives stabbing in my stomach and the nausea. I looked around. When I spot the notes it all comes flooding back.

Fuck.

Tonight. I was supposed to die tonight. How do you fail at fucking dying? They say "Look out or you might get yourself killed" while I say "Be careful or you might survive". At this point which is worse? Dying of a drug overdose or failing suicide.

Neither. The worst is looking at the clock and realising that in 3 hours none and I mean 0/5 of my brothers came to check on me. My door wasn't locked and they don't understand the concept of privacy so the answer as to why? Is that they simply didn't care. I really thought Elijah and Caleb did. I really did. But fuck that.

So I somehow made it to the bathroom and threw up. I didn't even notice the dry blood on my wrists at first. I can't be bothered to wash it off. Kinda pretty actually.

To think. I mixed two different drugs and I cut my wrists and here I still am fucking breathing. Next time I might just have to throw myself off the Golden. God bless Billie Eilish.

I put my AirPods in my ears blasting her music and went downstairs (purposely skipping 'listen before i go' ifykyk). I guess I forgot about the fact that I had done drugs hours ago as at first walking looked like I was trying to dance from one side of the hallway to the other. I heard my brothers downstairs. They were laughing. I sneaked past them and grabbed a bottle of whiskey and another of vodka from the kitchen.

My room connected to the roof so that's where I took the alcohol. After downing a one third of the whiskey and more than half of the vodka, I was feeling better. More confident. More like Athena. Kiara was weak and stupid. Athena was badass and killer. So that's how I got down from the roof and made my way downstairs still drinking the vodka. This time I went to the living room.

"Yes yes so funny" I exclaim quite loudly. They all look at me. Chris isn't there. Elijah just stares while Caleb's eyes travel straight to the now almost empty bottle in my hand. Alex and Dylan seemed to have noticed too.

"Who'd you share that with Kiara?" Alex asks. "Athena" I say proudly as her name makes the devil on my shoulder smile. "Who else?" he asks now looking angrier. "Well Kiara, Athena, me and of course I too" I say. It sounds so funny to me. Caleb walks up to me slowly and Elijah too. "Kie I think you're finished with that" he says trying to convince me to hand him the bottle. "No. Athena isn't finished yet" I say protectively. "Kie you're wasted" Elijah says from behind Caleb. I stumble back as Caleb tries to grab the bottle. Alex and Dylan are up on their feet too by now.

"Kiara, hand it over" Alex says. "Nooo" I whine. It's my baby. If I ever become a mommy I will name my kids Vodka, Tequila and Whiskey. Damn I'm a genius. Suddenly my hand feels empty. I check to find it empty. What?

"If you want it come get it" Alex says standing six hundred seventy three thousand billion miles away from me. "You're too far" I cry. But the thirst for more pushes me to walk. So I walk incredibly straight in his direction until I crash into a soft wall. "Alley you finally bought us soft walls" I say happily.

"Want me to help you?" The wall asked. Damn boy we rich. The wall is talking to me. "Hello mister wall sir no thanks I'm paradise" I say grinning. My legs give out for a second and I fall scratching my arm against the sharp edge of a table. Right over the previous cuts, which seemed to have opened. But the wall offers me great balance once again. They move too?

I usually consider myself a great breather but damn the oxygen seems to have made a run for it this time. I try to catch my breath but it doesn't seem to slow down. I fall again. This time the wall catches me. I try to think for reasons why I feel this shitty when I remember the weed I smoked alongside the vodka. Well fuck.

Oh the wall has hands. Wait a damn- That ain't no wall. No that's Caleb. Hi Caleb. But where did my soft wall go? Mister Wall just left me? Oh man. Never trust people yes but also never trust friendly walls. Damnit. I thought we were getting along. Eh. Who needs walls anyway? I do. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Walls. Yes.

"Earth to you!" he says. And I look at him. He wouldn't make a good wall. Sad. He would love being a wall. What's with me and walls today? He is saying something but I can't make out the words.

Oh he wants to help me. I'm a strong independent wall motherfucker, I don't need help.

"Kie, please let me help you" he begged me again. "No I'm okay" I said glaring at him. "You're bleeding and you can barely breathe, just please let me help you" he begged.

"There's two of you" I laughed. "Shit" I heard him mumble before everything went dark. Pitch black.

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Well she is wasted as fuck...

Oh well

Have a good day. Drink water and eat something. Don't drink kids!