10 | Hospital

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TW: talk about drug use and overdose, alcohol poisoning, suicidal ideation

Caleb

Of course I stood by her. Watching Torres pump her stomach, ridding her of all the toxins. Apparently she had first taken cocaine and sleeping pills, then drunk a shit ton of alcohol and topped it all off with weed. I can't remember the last time I saw Alex that pissed. He loved her of course but that level of self-destruction pissed him off. He knew that the second Kie saw him angry she would break even more. She is so close to breaking. If that wasn't it already.

"Alcohol poisoning and overdose?" I repeat Torres. He nods. Fucking hell. "I thought boys were supposed to be doing stupid shit like this" Alex says looking at Elijah and I. "Something's wrong" Elijah says. No shit Sherlock. "She wouldn't do that. Okay the Chris thing but worse things have happened and she never reacted like that" he continues. She really is breaking.

"I don't have time for speculations. Torres, figure out what's wrong and get back to me ASAP" Alex orders. Seems like he is breaking too.

"Where is Chris?" I ask Alex once we somehow got a moment alone. Elijah and Dylan went to get food. "I don't even want to know" he sighs. "We should-"

"Chris is one of the smallest problems right now" Alex cuts me off. "He is an adult. He can fucking handle himself. He doesn't mix drugs and alcohol together like your sorellina". The words are true but cruel. "I'm fucking missing something. Nobody just gets high and drunk for the fun of it. She is crying out for help but I don't know what to help her with" he seems sad. "You need to search her room again. If we missed something it's there" I say regretting every word. He nods also knowing it's wrong.

Alex

I know she has it hard. But this? Really? All this money and love.
New cuts, drugs...how?
I took them away. The blades and cigs, lighters and drugs. How did she still do this?

"I thought you had control over the situation" Hans says to me. "I did too. I mean I took every single thing that could hurt her away from the room" I sighs rubbing my eyes. "Don't blame this on yourself. She's alive and it's just another lesson to learn. Not to mix drugs and alcohol"
I know he meant well but it wasn't helping. How or where did she get this extra stash? Fuck me.

A nurse came to tell us she was awake. I went in and told our bodyguards not to let any other of our brothers enter. I needed to have this conversation between her and I. She can't always depend on Elijah or Caleb.

She sees me and her face is emotionless yet scared. "Don't hate me" is the first thing she tells me. "I don't hate you tesoro" I say trying to bury the hurt. "You have every reason to be mad at me. This was stupid. It wasn't supposed to go like this-" she rambled until I stopped her. "How was it supposed to go?" I ask her. She seems taken back. Like she wasn't expecting that.

"I was supposed to feel better" she says quietly. "You know drugs and alcohol can't give that to you" I say. Not lecturing, more like compassionately. "There was no better way" she says staring down at her bandaged wrist. It made me feel a bit calmer. She didn't say 'no other way'. Thank fuck. If she had said that, it would've meant she had fallen off the deep end.

"You could've come to us sorella" I tell her. She nods sadly. "Is Chris here?" she asks with a slight glimmer of hope. Extremely slight. "We don't know where he is at this time" I tell her truthfully. Her expression drops. Sadness. Why would she want Chris here?

"Does he hate me?" she finally asks. "Chris?" she nods. "Never. You're his sister" I try to sound convincing. I truly believe that Chris would never hate her but his actions... I'm not sure at this point.

"I don't think he loves me anymore" she whispers. My eyes shoot up to look at her teary ones. I go over to the bed and pull her close to me. Her sobs buried in my shirt. "Is that why?" I try to rephrase. "Is that why the drugs were the better option?" I ask. She nods her head against my chest. "What would've happened if you didn't have them?" I ask her.

She stops. Like somebody never before had asked something close to this. "What do you mean?" She asks now looking in my eyes. "Would you be here alive if you didn't have the drugs and vodka?" I ask.

Kiara

"Would you be here alive if you didn't have the drugs and vodka?"

He asked the question I had asked when I first woke up. How do I say 'no' without telling the truth or how do I say 'yes' without lying. God knows killing myself was the first option. He can't know that. He can't know I failed suicide so I took a bunch of drugs.

"No." I say finally. It's the truth. Somewhat. If I didn't have the drugs I wouldn't have tried to OD on them. But also if I didn't have them I would've tried something far worse.

"So if you hadn't found your peace in the bottom of the bottle and the end of a joint, you'd be dead?" he asks, more like clarifying. I nod looking down.

He hugs me, tighter this time. "We need you here tesoro" he says. "I can't lose you" . I don't think I've ever seen Alex cry.

•••

The words still run around in my head. He meant them. I heard it in his voice.

After he had gathered himself, he left to find Chris. I was alone. The nurse told me that my brothers weren't allowed in without Alex right now. I guess I understood it. I knew they were there.

It confused me quite one bit when this blond haired boy walked in. I had never seen him before. He looked a lot like my doctor but younger and way more energetic. He felt safe.

"Damn you're pretty" he says and I giggle. "Who are you?" I ask him. He smiles. It was beautiful.
"Luke" he winks at me.

Luke.

——————————————————————-

She's alive!
Yay

Anyway. Yeah. Well.

New character alert 😇

Drink water, not vodka babes 🤍

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