Broken (MxM)

Chapter 6

Killian got out of the car with Elio following behind him. Elio was shocked to see what was left of their home. Most of the windows were broken and blood was splattered everywhere. Killian held his hand and led him to the backyard. Marcus had told them where he buried Lorenzo and Elio doesn't even want to see what the inside of the house looks like. 

Elio spotted an open grave and he immediately ran to it, hoping to see his husband one last time but he was met with an empty grave. He jumped down the hole and it reached up to his knees. He started digging with his bare hands, trying to find Lorenzo's body but the soil underneath was hard, indicating that it has not been touched.

"No, no, he's not here. No," Elio cried as he attempted to dig deeper but Killain pulled him out from the open grave.

Elio pulled away from Killian and ran back inside the house, ignoring the putrid smell that lingered inside. He looked into every room inside the house but came up empty-handed every single time. Elio dropped to his knees on the living room floor in defeat. He felt robbed. Robbed of the opportunity to hold his husband's hand one last time. Robbed of the opportunity to give him a proper burial. 

Killian sat beside him and tried offering comfort but Elio pushed him away. After a few minutes, Elio stood up and ran back up to their old room. Killian followed silently behind him. Elio grabbed a bag from the closet and the gun that was hidden underneath it. When he heard Killain walk behind him, he didn't hesitate to remove the safety and point the gun at him. Killian barely flinched even when Elio pressed the tip of the gun on his forehead. 

"Let me go or else I'll put a bullet through your skull," Elio threatened. "You know it was stupid of you to even bring me here alone."

"We both know you have never killed anyone, Elio," Killian calmly said.

"You'd have the honor of being the first," Elio rebutted. "Now, let me go peacefully and you'd never see me again."

"I can't do that, Elio. I just got you back."

"Fine, I'll just have to let you go then."

His finger hovered over the trigger, itching to squeeze it but all his resolve fell when he saw Killian close his eyes, accepting his fate. Elio kept telling himself to finally pull the trigger so he can finally be free but his finger won't move. 

Just fucking kill him and get it over with. You saw Lorenzo do it multiple times, just squeeze the trigger. He thought to himself but his finger still wouldn't budge. 

Elio cursed under his breath and dropped the gun, clicking the safety on. 

"I fucking hate you," Elio spat. 

"I know," was all Killian replied. 

Elio put the gun back in the bag and dropped down on the bed. Killian sat beside him and wrapped an arm around his waist. 

"He reminded me of you," Elio paused.

Killian didn't have to ask who it was Elio was referring to. 

"Maybe that's why I was so attracted to him despite knowing the danger of being affiliated with him," Elio sighed.

"I should've stayed with you," Killian replied but it was barely audible. He was too scared to admit it out loud. 

"He was the one who saw me after your father stripped away my dignity," Elio said, making Killian cringe. "I tried calling you that day, but your number was suddenly unavailable so I walked over to where you worked at ten in the evening. You weren't there but your father was there. I asked him for you but he tried taking me into his car, rather forcefully so I panicked and tried to get away but he was stronger," Elio laughed humorlessly. "I was fucking weak. I should've fought harder."

"No, Elio. You weren't weak. What my father did was awful. I was just too stupid to see through his kind facade. You didn't deserve what happened to you nor was it your fault. I should've killed him with my own hands if I knew, but I was too blinded. He was the only one I had left after my mother left," Killian said. 

"I thought your mother was dead?" Elio asked.

"No, she's not. She just got a new life."

Elio nodded in understanding. A new life meant a new identity with zero affiliation with the mafia. It was rare for a person to completely rid themselves of any connection to the mafia. Someone was always out for a hunt.

"Do you know where she is?"

"No, and it's better that way," Killian replied. "We should go back. It's not safe to stay here for too long."

Killian stood up and took Elio's bag. They walked back to the car and drove back home. Elio wondered where his husband's body could be. Did someone take it? If they did, who was it? Once they reached the driveway, Elio spotted Marcus outside, talking with Killian's right hand, Cole. He marched over to him and grabbed him by the collar.

"Where the fuck is my husband?!" Elio yelled in his face.

"I buried him in the backyard!" 

"He wasn't there! His body wasn't there."

"What the fuck are you talking about?! I buried him there. I swear, Elio. That's where I put his body."

Elio pushed Marcus to the ground in anger and marched back inside. He doesn't know where their room is. All he knows is that he needed to be alone. He walked into one of the empty bedrooms and locked himself inside. 

"Where are you, Lorenzo?" Elio whispered under his breath as he swirled the ring on his finger. 

He stayed inside the room for no one knows how long. Nobody came looking for him. Marcus tried but Killian stopped him. Killian knew where he was so he stood outside the door, waiting for Elio to come out. It seemed kind of stalker-ish with the way that he was acting but he couldn't let Elio out of his sight anymore now that he has him back. 

Elio thought of all the times he and Lorenzo were together. The memories were mixed with the time when he and Killian were still together in high school. The two slowly morphed into one person. It was becoming eerie. The way Lorenzo laughed was the same as Killian. The way he talked was the same as Killian. The way Lorenzo loved him was the same as Killian.

Elio felt a pang of guilt in his heart. A sudden realization fell on him. He loved Lorenzo because he filled the hole Killain left. He had treated Lorenzo as a replacement, not an entirely new person. Elio felt the tears escaping his eyes as the realization hit him even more. The man died for him yet he never truly valued his love. Elio felt like an awful person. He wanted to blame it all on Killian but he knew that he would still be at fault, not Killian's.

Killian was starting to get impatient so he grabbed the master key from his pocket and as he was about to unlock the door, it opened, revealing Elio on the other side. 

"Hey, you okay?" Killian asked.

Elio just nodded and the two just stood there, waiting for each other to say the next words. 

"Do you want to have lunch?" Killian asked, breaking the silence. 

Elio nodded and the two headed over to the dining area where two plates of food are really waiting for them. The two sat down and began to eat if eating could be even described as what Elio was doing. He clearly had no appetite. Elio just pushed his food around his plate. His stomach was gurgling in hunger but he couldn't get himself to eat, even if the food looked appetizing. 

Killian sighed and took the fork from Elio and fed him. Surprisingly, Elio ate the food that Killian offered so he kept going until the plate was empty. Elio muttered a thank you before leaning his head against Killian's shoulder. A habit that Elio had when they were dating. The semblance of normalcy that Killian had been begging for was finally coming to light, and will never let Elio go again.