ELEVEN

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Reed and I were supposed to go shopping with April, that's what was repeating in Blair's head over and over again when she found out the news. Charlie and I were going to game plan how he was finally going to admit how he felt to her, they had decided that a while ago when she was staying over at Jackson and his apartment.

Now their apartment was bare, empty and sad and desolate and void—now no one lived there, not even Jackson. It had been almost two months already since he moved out of there. Two months still didn't feel like enough time.

Jackson and April were amongst the hospital staff that was given leave of absence after the incident and then put into therapy sessions so that they could eventually be cleared for surgery. Declan had taken over Blair's class to oversee finals since it was just three weeks left of the semester before summer break anyways anyways. 

She continued to dodge Hannah and Ryder's texts or messages. Did Hannah really have something to say now just because Jackson could have died? She felt bad for ignoring Ryder. He had been so supportive about the move, but he was Hannah's husband.

Her parents didn't call once.

When the unimaginable happens to you or a loved one, how are you supposed to just continue?

The first day, with the adrenaline and shock still coursing through the victims, April spent her time taking turns with Meredith waiting for Derek to wake up, sitting by his side when Meredith had to eat or go to the bathroom or anything else. Blair knew it's because she felt guilty for leaving the office. Blair also thought that was a pressure she shouldn't put on herself.

Blair still remembers what it felt like when she finally found Jackson.

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She could have probably thrown up in that moment, and the ugliest smile she could ever have was stitched across her face. It was all a bit fuzzy, she just remembered they were allowing people back into the hospital as long as they were screened first, while a lot of patients were being transported to Seattle Presbyterian Hospital. Declan had gone with her up until April saw her, running at her full speed.

"Ow, Ap," Blair winced as April collided with her, wrapping her arms around her, taking a step back with her bad foot. 

"Sorry, what?" April pulled away, looking all over Blair's body for any injuries before she settled on her ankle. "Oh, my God, what happened?"

"I fought a staircase and it won," Blair joked, tears welling in her eyes when she saw April without a scratch on her. "I'm so glad."

April turned to Declan, her eyes flashing between him and Blair.

"Declan," he put his hand out when he saw April's questioning stare. 

"Declan," April repeated as she took her hand, her face scrunching for a single second and Blair recognized the judging.

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