Your helping hand | Severus x Reader

〔 Chapter 16 , Unanswered and Tears 〕

Y/N's POV

Once the sun falls beneath the baby blue sky that turned to dark blue filled with stars that i wished we watched while we layed down and holding hands.

the temperature of the room fogged as the evening turned to night time while the moon shines high through the open windows that i wished to shatter.

This unorganized office i have isolated myself with despair. Words may sound crazy but oh, to how i miss that cold stare. It was cold that whenever i see it coming i shiver, but it still felt warm and fuzzy whenever you are around.

When this dead body layed down against on this stone floor, it felt like my back ached. The surroundings was nothing comforting, frames that was left tilted, papers scattered around the room while the time runs by so slowly. Despair has been attached between this walls while it suffocates me with it.

Call me dramatic.
but im slowly regretting my actions.

I regret pushing people away when i goddamn know, they just wanted to help for my sake. I regret leaving severus, ignoring his existence and i regretted it dearly.

As not only time skipped but also a beat of a heart i wish to not have. My eyes that has been fixed up at the empty white ceiling, questioning and wondering.

My eyes fell slowly at the side of the room, facing the sofa when my eyes caught something new. Something shiny like silver.
Curious eyes dropped when i reached my arm underneath the sofa and saw that silver ribbon. I asked to myself "Who would left a gift for me?"

I unwrapped the ribbon that was neatly tied up, before i saw what was inside i saw a note that was waiting to be cherished. At first, i questioned myself why was there a gift that was not given to me and hid it away when they could easy give it to me face to face..

I took a deep breath before opening the note and read - "Dear Snape"

My eyes grew shock.

No it was not from anyone but by me. This was for snape, a gift that was left underneath the dusty sofa. I read my own note, poetry was the way i wrote it and every sentence hit me until from the very end that says..
- "i love you, severus snape"

A tear prickled as it starts to fall like water falls as it made a river of memory lane.
My hands starts to shake while my head shook from disbelieve. I was certain I didn't love him that i left him like he was nothing but now i truly regret now that i knew i loved him from the start.

I turned my head to gaze at that silver quill that i also remember, that memory. I described him with all my heart.
Does black onyx eyes, his perfectly and imperfections that i admire, his scent of potions and books or tea and that damn smile i loved from eternity. I fought to myself, no. I will not stand and leave this feeling on hold. I will not hesitate to confess or let this feelings go. I lost myself at first but i will not take a chance of will to lose someone precious just like you. Severus Snape. Forgive me even if you lost hope.

Pushing myself all together as i stood up from this sorrowful pit, and that moment that i felt like i achieved something once again, when i finally reached that door and ran through the halls to find my dear sunshine that i needed the most.

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Snape's POV

My pace went faster than the usual. After hearing does words, it just weightens me even more than life is giving me. I can not stand this situation, its to complicated and unreal that it almost felt torture to think that this is reality.

Walking down the corridors as my cloak has the same rhythm with the pace. Passing through each frame to frame of paintings with my even dead face. When there's grey clouds following me that kept giving me signs that I'll never have someone to be in my side for eternally.