Black Widow | 18+

18 | Apologies

Artemisia 

Yesterday, for the first time ever, someone made love to me. 

And it was beautiful. 

Granted it came after some very intense sex that was more fuelled by hate and frustration than anything else. But Leandro was right, through all of that hate I would only love him ten times more. 

Waking up in the morning had been one of the most peaceful things I had ever experienced. My body sheltered by Leo's large frame, his arm around my waist, and his lips pressed against my shoulder blade as he trailed up to my neck. 

I basked in the thought as I sat with Carina by the pool later that morning, she was desperate to know how things had gone, and I told her. 

"So, he loves you?!" She whispered, peering around to make sure none of the men were lurking around, but relaxing when she remembered that they had all left. 

"Yeah, I missed that part out yesterday." I sighed, looking at the sea that lay beyond the edge of the infinity pool. 

"And the sex? How was it?" she asked 

"First round was intense but amazing, we were both frustrated and I was hating him a little, but the second round..." I trailed off as I got caught up in the flashing scenes replaying in my mind, the memory of Leo praising me as I let him have me. 

"He made love to you," she smirked, sitting back on the sun bed. "Who would've thought that Leandro Torromandi was even capable of that." 

"I thought that as well," I mused

"So, this means that your fling with Romulo is over, right?" She asked, and I frowned. 

It was, but he was such a nice guy and the moments we'd shared together had been meaningful; but he knew that it would come to an end eventually, and I was planning to get out of Sicily tomorrow either way. 

"Yeah, he knows, I told him." I murmured and Carina sighed. 

"Don't shoot me, but that man will put anything down for you if you ever want him back." She said, and I shrugged. 

"We haven't put an end to the contact, but what's the point if we're going to be thousands of miles apart, both of us working? He needs to get married anyway, can't be wasting time on a woman who won't settle for being a subservient house wife." 

"That is a very good point," Carina nodded. "How did he take it?"

I thought back to the conversation we had had this morning, where I'd managed to get back into the house only five minutes before he arrived to see me. 

We didn't have sex, both agreeing it would make things much worse, but we did agree to stay friends and keep in touch. Maybe that was wishful thinking on his side of things, but for me, as bad as it sounded, I did it because if things went wrong with Leandro, I couldn't bare to be alone through that. 

Don't get me wrong, I really cared about him, I wouldn't have been so comfortable around him with his friends unless it was real, but having experienced what Leo and I did last night, I knew I couldn't just run to someone who wanted to fuck me, I wanted to run back to someone who cared about me like Romulo did, where it was mutual. 

But also where it was normal, where there weren't chains to my past around both of our necks, where my pain was unknown and I got to be the normal girl I so desperately wanted to be. 

It was horrible, I knew that, but I couldn't get over the fact that to him I was just a woman with an attractive job that he could importantly look past. He wanted to care for me, I wanted to care for him; he wanted to laugh with me, not dig around.