Black Widow | 18+

25 | Why Me?

Artemisia 

It had been ten weeks since the day I had been locked up within these four walls, and I was starting to lose the plot. 

There had been a slight shift to my routine however; I still worked out for as long as possible in the mornings, and then commenced with my day, but now I found myself thinking more about everything  when I was alone, the thoughts only being soothed by a person or a thing. 

Anton or Alcohol, and when put together I could totally forget about everything swirling around my head. 

Chiefly Leandro. 

I would wake up, breathless and unsettled having just seen him in a dream I kept on having. We were in the same room, but I was being kept by a shadowed-figure's side, and he was smiling and laughing with Clementina with a child in his arms that faced away from me. 

In the dream I felt an ache in my heart watching the pair of them, and I tried to fling myself forward to get to him, but the figure kept me pressed against their body. 

But before I could say anything to grab his attention, Leandro's eyes found mine, and he simply saw me as anyone else before putting an arm around his wife and smiling at his child. 

I opened my eyes, finding it hard to gage where I was, and I sat up to see Anton sleeping next to me, a big reminder as to why I wasn't with Leandro in the first place. 

He had betrayed me again, just like he did all those years ago, robbing me of the one person I would die for in this life after he almost allowed mine to be lost on two occasions. 

I sighed and leant back against the headboard, running a hand through my hair, noticing the shift in the bed next to me. 

"Come here," he murmured, lying on his back and beckoning me to lie on his chest. 

I did as he asked and curled into his side, allowing Anton to wrap his arm around me and run his hand up and down my back. 

"You keep on waking up baby," he mumbled into my hair, and I found myself clinging onto him a little tighter. "What's going on?"

"I don't know," I sighed, wondering what Otterly would be thinking of my sudden disappearance. "I'm okay though,"

Anton hummed as he began to run a hand through my hair and a period of silence followed as I took comfort in his hold. 

"I have to go away for a couple of days," he murmured

"Why?" I asked, suddenly sitting up. 

If Anton wasn't there, then I couldn't distract myself well enough, and I knew that spiralling was a very real possibility. His eyes remained closed and he pulled me back down into his chest. 

"New York, I need to see how things are going." He sighed and I felt my heart drop. My body stiffened, my mind unleashing the worst scenarios imaginable. 

I hated that I feared him getting hurt, because those old habits and old feelings had been unleashed with Leandro's presence gone, something I had stupidly allowed to happen. It was as if Leandro was never there in the first place sometimes, only when I was so caught up in the fleeting normality of the relationship (or whatever it was) that Anton and I had. 

"Angel, it'll be okay." He soothed. 

"I know," I murmured, "it's just risky." 

"Of course," Anton replied, "but it's only three days,"

Three days, 72 hours, 4320 minutes. 

Anything could happen. 

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