A DEEP CUT

chapter 20

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She noticed the distant look  on his face.

"Hey" he looked up at her "I forgive you" he shook his head.

"You shouldn't " she frowned.

"Why not?" He stayed silent for a second.

"Because...I don't deserve it " Lana thought that he looked like a kid apologising for misbehaving wich was kinda cute, it's sad that he thought he didn't deserve any forgiveness.

"Does that mean that you don't want to be my friend ?" His head snapped in her direction so fast that she feared he would break his neck.

"You-you want to be my friend? " he was so shocked that he thought maybe he was dreaming but she was infront of him looking very real ,someone trusted him. All the people the winter soldier has met are either dead or wanted to experience ,torture, sell, fight or use him.

"Yeah ,I mean if you want ofcourse but I would be happy to be your friend " suddenly he felt this desire within him to make her happy after she said those words .he wanted to make her happy.

"Okay" that's all what he managed to say but he felt satisfied when he saw her smile brightly at him ,watching her smile made him want to do anything and everything to keep that smile on her face ,it was then that he felt the need to protect her, it confused him because he never felt anything like this he never felt anything for that matters but that doesn't matter to him now all that matters was her ,she is his friend now.

"I'm Svetlana by the way " he realized that he didn't really know her name.

"Winter soldier "

"I'ma call you winter "he nodded giving her a small smile.

Both assassins stayed in silence until JARVIS'S voice filled the room informing her that team were coming in.

His voice made the soldier flinch slightly ,after a while the door opened and the team walked in ,like they were walking on eggshells wich they were at this moment as he eyed every singleoneof them with cold eyes, Lana immediately stood up and took a few steps forward to make sure no one gets hurt.

"Lana you're okay ?" Loki asked checking her for injuries, he noticed the cut on her face and tilted her head to the side, the soldier watched the interaction and he didn't like that not one bit ,he felt like this guy was touching what's his. In a blink of an eye he wrapped his real arm around her waist and pulled her to him until her back hit his hard chest ,in his other hand he held the sharper ready to slice whoever's throat that touched her.

"Mine" he growled in a low voice .

"No no winter, they're not gonna hurt us " the white and black haired agent said turning around seeing he didn't want to let her go, her voice seemed to calm him down a little bit but he still held the sharper firmly in his hand.

"They're gonna take you away" her theory is that he thought that they were in HYDRA and they are gonna take her away from him just like they took everything away from him.

"Winter look at me "she demanded with a soft voice ,once his eyes met her icy blue ones his eyes softened.

"Give it to me" she said not breaking eye contact, he looked downa weapon in his hand one last time then handed it over to her.

"See that wasn't very hard was it? " she smiled turning around to face the team who were trying to figure out how to bring bucky back, unbeknownst to her that the soldier was starring at his hand the one that was resting on her stomach he felt fear consume him as he slowly removed his hand his eyes widened at the sight he was met with ,something snapped in him .the winter soldier wasn't in control anymore.

A wave of sadness and guilt made its way into his heart, he didn't remember all what happened that day just that he left her laying there plus the nightmares from now and then, but now him standing here looking directly at the scars he made on the most important person in his life the only person that showed him nothing but kindness and comfort ,he remembered everything from the fight that happened between them to the moment he shot her.

"No no no-" he repeated over again catching the attention of the people in the room.

Svetlana turned to check on him ,she immediately took notice of his pained  expression but he wasn't looking at her.

She cursed herself for forgetting to put a shirt on before coming here but it was an emergency, for the past months bucky was with them she tried to cover them as much as she could because she knew if he saw them he would feel super guilty about it and shut her out, she manged to do that .well until today.

"Bucky..." she started ,putting a hand on his shoulder; he shrugged it off.

"GET AWAY FROM ME" he yelled making them flinch including Svetlana wich didn't go unnoticed him.

His eyes flash with incredible hurt, just for a second before he placed his emotionless mask back on he felt like he lost the ability to breathe so he ran as fast as he can to lock himself up in his room.

He collapsed on the floor after slamming the door shut, tears flowing down his face .

He spent that night with only one thing on his mind.

She flinched

Poor bucky right? But don't worry he's gonna get better soon with the help of our Cruella