The Wounds of Our Past // Gerard Way x reader

17. i thought she said shower?

Tour.

The first night of our tour was tomorrow.

I haven't spoken to Mikey in almost two weeks now, even though we've been "fighting" for longer. Gerard was my rock though. He kept me going even when I didn't realize I wanted to stop. We've been dating for two months now. It's crazy but a good crazy. He's everything to me. I just wish Mikey would see that.

Or maybe he does?

Im not sure what's up his ass but Im getting inpatient with his behavior towards me. Tonight, I'm gonna fix things. Even though Im not the one who should.

Everyone's in California, staying at a nice hotel. It's so odd because we were big back in 2008 but now we're huge. I always considered myself a background character in the band. I wasn't well loved but I also wasn't hated. I was just kinda there in the eyes of the fans.

I had a few devoted followers but Id usually only ever come across them every couple shows. I guess it's hard to "upstage" people like Gerard and Frank. But Mikey and Ray had tons of fans? I always forget I have the power of google in my back pocket. A quick little search may give me my answers.

"Why did fans not like y/n l/n of mcr"

I came across a few articles talking about my role in the band and how it was easy to underestimate me and because I was the only "girl" people tended to like the guys more than me. It just made me really scared for tomorrow night.

What if no one cares Im "back." Why should they? I wasn't an asset to mcr. I wrote a few songs here and there and sang backups and a few lead vocals, but other than that, did I really do anything for the band?

I felt my vomiting coming up. It hasn't been a problem for me in the past couple weeks, but I knew it would come back eventually. Especially with all this added stress Im under.

My mouth started to salivate. My stomach churned in a clockwise direction. All I could taste was saltiness. I tried to fight it, but it became too much. I ran to the bathroom a few doors down. I barely made it in time.  I threw up serval times. Each time felt worse than the last one.

Vomiting felt like getting multiple punches to the gut. My head was getting dizzy too. I was on my knees now, clutching the toilet bowl for support.

I knew I was being loud.

I heard rushed steps all throughout the hotel room. I wasn't sure who it was. Gerard and I were sharing but he said some of the guys might come over. But, it distracted me enough to make the vomiting stop.  Not long after, Gerard rushed in. He immediately joined me on the floor and held a cold wet rag to my face and then my mouth. Once he was done, he let me rest my head on his shoulder.

He knew how stressed I was. Stressed about everything. And how Mikey was only making things worse.

"What's on your mind, hon?"

I paused. I wasn't expecting him to talk to me, I know, stupid. "Just thinking about things. And how my stomach hurts."

"I'm sorry, y/n/n. Im sorry I missed the whole ordeal. I was in Ray's room when Mikey came and told me you were vomiting."

Mikey...?

So, he knew I was vomiting, quite violently I must say, and instead of helping me he just went to my boyfriend? I understand he got Gerard, but in the past Mikey would have ran to the bathroom the second he heard me gag into the toilet.

"Thanks for helping me, Gee. I really do love you."

He said it back and pressed kisses to my hair.

I wanted to take a shower. I tried standing up but I was too weak and dizzy. Gerard caught me and held me up. "Why'd you get up?"

I turned to him slowly. "Shower."

"Do you need help?"

I saw his face turn and felt mine go red too. I knew he genuinely wanted to help and not take advantage of the situation, but what can you do? I nodded, against my better judgement. "But, I'm not really ready for you to see-" I motioned towards my stomach and thighs, "everything."

He nodded and started to turn away. I stopped him and let him watch me slowly take off my clothes. I left my bra and underwear on. They were a dark shade of purple with stripes. They weren't anything sexy. They did show off my tattoos though.

"You're-"

"I hope i'm not making you uncomfortable, Gee"

He nodded no. "Y/n you're perfect... am I allowed to um..." He gestured towards my body. I nodded. He slowly put his hands around my waist and held me in a tight hug. He played with my hair and kissed my bare shoulders.

He then stopped and turned of the water to help bathe me. I suddenly felt very uncomfortable. I didn't want to be a burden. The water was rising and he helped me sit down in the tub. "Wait!" He froze and gave me his full attention. "Maybe, you could uh join me?"

He blushed. "I dunno, hon. Are you sure you wanna see me? Im not the same guy that could wear skinny jeans." I nodded. "Gee, I promise I'd love to see you. Not because of how your body looks, but because it's you. I love you."

He slowly took off his clothes and all that was left were his boxers. I gasped and quickly got up from the tub. It made me very dizzy but I pushed through. He seemed shocked when I held him tightly just like he did to me. I kissed his chest and rested my hands on his shoulders.

I lead him to the tub and he leaned on me and rested his head on my chest.