The Wounds of Our Past // Gerard Way x reader

23. lie to me.

I was still spooked after last night.

I could barely sleep. Was I losing it? Was it real? I don't know. Why 20? Why was it me in 2004? Let's reflect. 2004 was around the time Gerard started to drift away from me, and the 2005 was the start of our fights and such. I guess 2004 was the last time I was happy, generally speaking. Besides now, 2004 was nice. I mean, Gerard was struggling but I think he was getting better? I can't remember it very well...

Either way, I feel sick to my stomach. My head still hurts, arguably worse than before, and my body feels like I've fallen several flights of stairs. Maybe Im dehydrated or something? I dunno, I just feel like shit. Gerard went out to get us lunch, but they've been gone for a while. So, I was just left here to just think. All of the sudden, my phone started blowing up with notifications from people. They all told me to check twitter, which was terrifying.

I opened the app with a shaky hand and saw pictures of me. I was entering the hotel, with all that food, and the bouquet for Gerard in my hands. Everyone was freaking out that I was holding flowers, because they knew it must have been for someone special in my life. Like a partner.

Shit.

There's only been one show so far, and people already know I'm at least with someone. Great. I threw my phone on the bed and got up to take a quick shower. I didn't even want to look at myself. Last night freaked me out so much, I just didn't want to risk it.

I took my clothes off and entered the shower. I closed my eyes and let the hot water just fall down my face to the rest of my body. When I finally opened my eyes, I looked down with soap on my hands to start cleaning myself. My body looked...off. Most of my tattoos were gone again. I looked a few pounds heavier too. I started hyperventilating and grabbed my hair. It was longer than I have it now. It was black with blue pieces.

I looked like this years ago.

I couldn't breathe. All I did was cry. I slowly opened the shower curtains to face myself in the mirror. I looked and there I was. I looked about ten years younger. I fell to my knees and just rocked myself back and forth as the hot water fell on me. I don't know how long I did this but it must have lasted a while. Someone started frantically beating on my room's door. The bathroom was right next to it. I got up quickly, taking one big look at myself again, this time, I hadn't changed back like I did when Gerard saw me. I still looked... like wherever this was. I threw my clothes on me, they stuck on my wet body. I hated the feeling but shook it off as I looked through the peephole of the door. The person was moving so much, I couldn't tell who it was. They were still beating the door. I slowly opened it and they grabbed me and hugged me hard.

Mikey.

"y/n! Oh my god, I- I-" He was sobbing like I was earlier. I pushed our body's more into the room and closed the door behind us. I looked at him for the first time and froze. He looked ten years younger too. He saw me, and was speechless. "-I woke up... like this! Oh god, what's happened to us?!" He cried out. I didn't even know what to say. "I felt sick last night and threw up, when I looked at myself, I was 20 again, but I immediately went back to normal when Gerard saw me. But now..."

We looked like teenagers again. Just how when Mikey was 18 and I was 17. Still in high school, and in our newly formed band, my chemical romance. I sat down and put my head in my hands. Mikey hadn't calmed down yet and was pacing back and forth in the room. "How are we supposed to go outside! We look like we're in high school, y/n! Oh my god, and we have a show tonight! How are we going to hide this?!?" I looked at the clock, it was 2:45. Gerard had been gone for an hour now, and he had to leave for sound check in another hour. Even if we figured it out, we were on a huge time crunch.

"Gerard can't see us like this, no one can... but especially him." Mikey nodded in agreement. "He's gonna be here any minute..." I breathed out. "Okay, so we look like how we did during bullets, so... let's go with it." Mikey looked confused, "How are we supposed to "go with it?!" "Let's just pretend we're doing this on purpose? Like, we're cosplaying our past selves for the show tonight." He nodded, "Then we need to dress like we use to..." I sighed. We were gonna look like gay losers. Not that it was a horrible thing, but it was kind of our vibe back then... maybe it still was?

"Get your suitcases with your clothes and bring them here, and don't get noticed." Mikey nodded and left. A few minutes passed and I heard a knock on the door. I opened it thinking it was Mikey, but no, it was Gerard. It was barely opened before I slammed it closed. "Gee! I uh- I have a surprise for tonight... Um... can you come again in a little bit?" They were quiet at first, but then they said, "But... I have your food?" I sighed, I felt so guilty. I wanted to let them in, and apologize, but they would freak out if they saw me or Mikey like this. I cracked the door open and held out my hands. He slowly placed a take out box in my hands, and then I ripped them back in the room. "Thank you Gee, I'll see you soon okay? I'm just... planning something right now..." He mumbled something and I heard him walk away.

After his footsteps grew silent, Mikey barged in. "I had to hide from him." He explained how he was almost caught by Gerard in the hall as he pushed two suitcases in and threw them on the bed. I unpacked too and we laid our clothes in different places on the bed to see what we had to recreate old outfits.

Eventually we pieced together two outfits for us to wear. I went to the bathroom to get changed and when I did, I almost gagged. I really looked like how I did when I was 17. I fixed my hair in two low space buns to really complete the look. I walked out and saw Mikey. I sighed and looked at us in the mirror on the wall. If you and no idea who we were, you'd think we were teens getting ready to attend the show tonight. "Makeup." He said. "What?" "You need to do your makeup like back then. It'll make more sense... And can you do that contour shit on me to make me look less... baby faced?"

And that's exactly what I did. After we were completely done, there was 20 minutes left till sound check. It really started sinking in that we were in the bodies of our past teenage selves. "You can't let Gerard kiss you and stuff..." I didn't even think of that, but Mikey was right. As much as I loved Gerard, it'd be weird and downright gross to do anything with him in this state. "We gotta tell him, but how?" Mikey shrugged at my question.

"What even is this?" I asked. Mikey tried to talk but shut himself down. "I looked online for answers, but this has never happened to people who have like, time traveled with that forsaken game." He said. The game. Oh my god, the game.

"We didn't follow the rules correctly... remember?" I mumbled to him. "Yeah we did. We used- oh... well... we really did wing it.... Oh christ..." I nodded. Whatever we did, whatever it did to us, it was our fault.

"What are we supposed to do?" "I uh, I dunno... I mean, I looked 20 last night, maybe this is temporary?" It was no use trying to theorize. We had to leave for sound check, but most importantly, we had to leave with the guys, with Gerard. I looked at the food Gerard had brought me and placed in the room's fridge.

There was a car ready to go on the back end of the hotel. Gerard texted me and said they were all waiting for Mikey and I. We made our way to the car, nervous as hell, and entered. The looks we got were crazy. No one said anything so Mikey broke the ice.

"Like our costumes?"