love lessons | charlie kelly x reader

14 - bar crawl

"hey-o!"

a chorus of identical replies scattered from all corners of the pub as Dennis strolled in leisurely. he stopped in his tracks and gestured limply. "what's up with the.. decor?"

"bar crawl- jackin' up prices, makin' the bar a little more.. Irish-y, y'know, the like." Frank replied from his slouched position from the chair, simply watching all other members of said bar doing their actual jobs for once.

"ahh, i see, nice touch. anyone tackled the bathrooms yet?" Dennis rested his elbows on the bar top, eyes scanning over the new price list. "one of the toilets is overflowing- y'know, since mac went in last night?"

"i think Charlie's gonna do it whenever he gets back." Y/n grunted atop a rickety stool in attempt to hang another one of the many shamrocks around the bar, because apparently that is the staple of Irish culture, apart from drinking and fighting... well, according to Frank anyways.

"when he gets- where is he, he's been gone for like a half hour!" Dee complained from the pool table, again, decorated in shamrocks of varying size.

Y/n climbed down from her previous balancing act. "think he's supposed to be gettin' more decorations and a new plunger. thanks, Mac."

"i did not block that toilet, it was practically already blocked when i used it-"

"you used it when it was overflowing?" Dee deadpanned. Mac shrugged and adjusted the new and very tacky, 'kiss me, i'm Irish!' sign that hung awkwardly between the bathrooms. "i'd had chili earlier."

all heads turned as the sturdy door into the pub flew open, a rather panicked little man holding a toilet plunger and what looked to be a fiddle and some other instrument under each arm. "guys- GUYS, we're in big trouble, big, big trouble!" he slammed each item onto the bar top one by one, hands flurrying around him nervously after.

"why's that? for fuckssakes, what did you idiots do now?" Frank spat, seemingly irritated, but not surprised. the group slowly reconvened around the unnerved Charlie. a hand ran through his already disheveled hair. "the waitress, man, the waitress was like right behind me- i swear, she's comin', she just got outta her twenty four hour hold-"

"the waitress is what you're worried about?" Y/n scoffed, once tense shoulders suddenly relaxing.

"yeah, Charlie, let's be honest; she's not much of a threat to us." Dennis shrugged simply and returned to mixing some sort of simple drink for himself.

"no, dude- no, she looked pissed man, like really pissed. so, you guys may wanna watch your backs, just warnin' ya."

"we might wanna? what about you, Charlie? your as much a part of this as we are!" Mac was quick to question the integrity of Charlie's statement, eyes narrowed over the fidgeting man.

"well, see, i'm not really because y'know...," he cleared his throat, voice dropping low. "i'm gonna agree and back her up on everything." he spoke quickly as if maybe somehow, if he talked fast enough, they wouldn't hear.. but of course, they did.

"Charlie, what the hell! we're in this together, you can't just abandon all principles at the chance of her talking to her!" Dee protested against the man, to which he simply shrugged. "hey, that's business, Sweet Dee, that's business- wait, you think she'll talk to me?!"

Mac sighed. "jesus, Charlie, this is just sad."

"i agree with him."

"what? why? agree with that statement?!" Dennis' eyes widened in utter confusion and frustration. Y/n nodded. "i mean, i am the one helping him through this, so yeah. and besides, it's two against five, who cares? majority wins."