greys anatomy imagines

addison montgomery - you're losing me

female pov <3

"I don't understand what the problem is" addison says to you obviously annoyed
"I know that you don't THATS the problem"
you say unsure how she's so oblivious about this.
" what so now i can't even acknowledge derek's existence?" she throws her hand up
"God Addison you really don't get it" you finally lose your temper "this has been happening for so long and I just waited for a cure to magically fix the problem but that's the thing there's no cure"

Addison raises her eyebrows at you because you've never snapped at her like that. Then she turns around to shut the door to your room because you live with george, mer, and izzie and both of you know damn well their listening in.
"never raise your voice at me like that again"
she pauses "do you realize what i've given up for you, how many sacrifices i've made?"
you don't respond but inside you do know how much she's done for you. Hell she basically gave up her family for you.
"I destroyed a marriage for you y/n do you not get that" she finally snapped "I loved you so much i ruined my family for you"
"loved" you repeat to her "past tense"
she doesn't say anything
"I saw you winking at derek addison"

you wait to see if you can read her face. As soon as you popped out those words you could see the panic on her face. then a tear. A tear. Addison never cried. she quickly wiped it away.
"Every morning Addison. I looked at you with so much hate behind my eyes. Wondering to myself how I could love somebody I knew was blatantly cheating on me with her ex-husband. How could you tell me that you loved me. how the hell addison" you started crying "every time I saw you I would try to avoid you because i didn't want to face you. I knew that I loved you too much to hate you."

She tries to walk towards you and tries to hug you. but you push her hands away and with that another tear comes falling.
"How long were you gonna let this happen to us? Until we were too far gone to love eachother? I gave you all of me. All of my empathy and for the record you didn't deserve most of it, all I did was bleed and you just stood there and watched me knowing what you were doing" you scream at her "In my head over and over and over again I kept thinking do something babe or say something about it addison or even risk our relationship for the truth and now i have nothing left. you took everything in my life up addison"

she backs up as far as she can until she hits the shut door.
"baby i'm-" she tries to apologize
"get out"
"wha-"
"get out addison" you say firmly
She nods her head and the tears start rolling from her eyes. She grabs her belongings and opens the door without a second glance she goes  down the hallway. you stay still until you here the front door close. You fall to the ground against the wall and start sobbing. As soon as they all have time to here you crying george izzie and meredith run into your room and wrap you into the most loving hug.
"i loved her." you cry into their shoulders "so much"
"We know babe" izzie says "it's gonna be okay"
"y/n she doesn't know what she lost" george says looking at izzie and meredith with a concerned face
"she lost me" you say