dedication to @5Secondsof1D_2B1 as you my dear have been reading since basically the beginning and it always makes me happy to see you vote <3 you guys should check our their fics too, i have to say i for one love them both x
"I saw you."
The words echoed in my mind like a feverish dream that burned itself into my subconscious. They floated, they hung around and they stuck in my mind like flies to a spiders web as they were wrapped up by the theories, conclusions and unanswered questions my mind came up with.
I saw you.
Where, when, why, how. All the questions I asked myself had so many possible answers but none quite chilled me to the bone as one did. One theory. One conclusion. One goddamn question I fear to be true though I knew it was the only rational thing it would be.
I forgot what sleep was as my mind wondered in the night. I stared up at the boards of the ceiling that hung low above my creaking bed. I heard his words on replay like a broken record, singing again and again on a never ending loop as they wrote themselves onto the old wooden boards above my head.
They started off big, large lettering in pure print screaming out what had been said. Then they got smaller, skinnier in script as they scraped along the wood. The letters would fatten or thin, they would become stout or elongated just to take up any space there was left. Soon enough they filled all available space though I knew it to only be my imagination that created the writing on my ceiling, and part of me almost dares to think it was only my imagination that created the words themselves.
I saw you.
But saw me where pray tell, for my very thoughts could only run amuck in my mind as I hunted for another answer beyond the one that I feared to be true.
The rational part of me fought to say that he hadn't meant what I thought. That simply must have heard him wrong because there is no chance on gods green earth that he could have meant what haunted my mind.
There was no way he had seen me, no way in hell. I stuck to the shadows and wore them like a cloak of invisibility, hiding myself in the darkness of the still night. Whether those shadows came from the old tree in my garden, or the house who's porch I hid on and even my own second floor room.
No, he couldn't have seen me there. He couldn't have seen me, but he saw me somewhere.
The rational side of my brain came up with a number of theories, conclusions even while a voice seemed to battle and batter each and every one of them.
The mall. But I never go there.
The park. He would never go there.
In school. Obviously I was there, its not important.
Somewhere else. But there was nowhere else.
Or perhaps that was the irrational part of my mind.
In fact: that was the irrational part of my mind. The rational was that whispering voice that never shuts up like a guilty conscience.
The realisation hit me like the car that wrapped it's front hood around the dented lampost at the end of my street.
My fathers words angered words and crumpled report card faded away, my mother's blissful ignorance as she sang along to the radio became background noise as I gripped the glass in my hand so hard that if I had noticed, perhaps I would have feared it shattering.
He saw me. He saw me as I hid like a child in fear of being seen. He saw me as I watched him I wide eyed wonder. He saw me, as I hid so I could see him.
He saw me, and I wasn't sure what that meant.
But, at this realisation came another as I remembered the brush of his lips, the warm breath that tumbled past them and ghosted along my skin in such a way that had me closing my own eyes, wanting something more than just those words.
But it was before.
Before hot breath fanned out along my neck. Before the brush of his lips made my hair stand on end and my heart beat falter. Before his palm pressed to my shoulder as fingers grazed along my white school shirt.
The realisation of that moment before hit me as my fathers own hand collided with my cheek, and the glass I once held shattered against the ground.
"He said my name."
A/N so this is one of my favourite chapters?? i know it may seem liek a 'filler' to some but this chapter is actually pretty important since it has the realisation and a mini insight into michaels life ooo
in other news, i will be having a muke one shot pop up pretty soon so keep your eyes peeled for that my friend is currently editing it (we're skyping and she just hit page twelve of seventeen oops) so yeah, i'll be talking about that soon.
as always thank you for reading, remember to vote and comment and all that lovely stuff
until next time my beauties,
- rachel x
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pretty chapped lips : malum :
Fanfiction"Once upon a time, I met a boy who would smoke more than he'd weigh." in which michael is a quiet sixteen year old who ghosts through life without really living at all: that is, before he finds himself infatuated with a boy who flirts with death lik...
