pretty chapped lips : malum :

1.9

if you see this within a day, there's 100% of a chance you're one of my favourite readers.

I've never understood true friendship. But then again, that's probably because I've never had one I've had to understand before. 

"I want to ask him out." 

Had this been some high school drama, there more than probably have been a slam of a tray against the lunch table at that. But instead it was just a plastic container with his lunch that hit the table instead. Not as effective, but still made a bit of a point. 

But the scrambling to grab the apple that fell off the top kind of ruined it.

Like always, I kept my mouth shut and just let Luke do as he wanted. Though I had an urge to inform him of how I highly doubted a guy two years above who doesn't even know his name would want to be with him, I didn't. Instead I just let him talk, trying to care with my chin rested on my palm, head nodding once and a while as he rambled about the oh so unattainable Ashton Irwin with his oh so bright hazel eyes (not green, Michael, but hazel).

I don't know how friendships work, at least, not really. I never had afriend until I met luke. I'm not sure how it started, im not sure if its always been this way, but from ever since I can remember, I didn't have friends. There were no kids in pre school that wanted to talk to the shy boy  that played with Lego in the corner. There were no kids in primary that wanted to befriends with the quiet boy that kept his nose in a book. And there were no teenagers in high school that thought it would be cool to hang out with the kid that sits at the back with his earphones in to tune the world out.

UntilI met luke; but even then, im not sure if this is friendship.

He was new when we met. Fresh of fourteen, long blonde bangs and an old varsity jacket I now know belonged to his brother Jack. He was the stereotypical new kid trying to come off as a cool kid. He was popular for a bit, made the right (wrong) kind of friends who chewed him up and spit him out.

That was when we met.

We had biology together, nothing special. It was day that they spat him back out, everyone laughing in the halls and whispering in class about the scrawny blond boy with hair in his eyes and words weighing his shoulders down. He sat in the chair across from me and no one would leave him alone. Notes were being past, looks were being shot and words muttered around the class. But it wasn't until Darien Lake decided to say something that things changed.

"What's wrong, Lukey?" He said, voice of venom and evil glinting eyes."Sad your little crush doesn't like faggots?"

Oh so bright blue eyes I never thought would become so familiar to me weld with tears. Students cackled like they had never heard anything funnier. And when the first tear drop hit the desk, I had enough of some kid being the schools new laughing stock.

"Piss off, Lake. I would tell you to go fuck yourself, but considering your dick is too soft to screw a whore like your girlfriend, im guessing you don't have that ability."

After that day, Darien shut up, and I had a new biology partner. 

"Your dad works away at the weekends, right? Right. Okay, so here's what we do: we can finish the Music project on Friday through Saturday, try to brainstorm how I'll get Ashton to date me and maybe catch a movie."

I blinked.

Luke just sat there, chewing on the pasta I didn't even notice him open. Innocently blinking his oh so bright blue eyes with his head tilted, waiting for a response which I wasn't sure of as of yet.

This wasn't part of the deal of ourfriendship. We sit together in class, we work on projects and I help him with English. This isn't how we do things.

"Um..Yeah?"

A/N HI HELLO THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL CONTAIN INTERESTING THINGS 

I HAD TECH ISSUES UPLOADING IF YOU CANT TELL 

anyways i hope you enjoyed this and please tell me if you did and comment and blah blah on what you think/hope to happen soon !!

love youu,

-rachel x