The Exposure

Chapter Fifty-Three

          Graduation day arrives and you're a bit nervous about the ceremony, not being a fan of having so many eyes on you, but once you've walked across the stage and accepted your degree, you can't help beaming with pride. Snape watches you from amidst the row of teachers and winks at you, giving his own proud smile and making you blush. You feel a deep sense of satisfaction for getting this far, when there'd been so many times you weren't even sure you'd make it out of bed in the morning or be able to face the anxiety of the day.

          Later that evening, a huge graduation dinner is held in the Great Hall. You sit amidst your peers as everyone talks about going out into the world and starting their lives. You think about starting your own, with Severus. You begin twirling your hair as you think about living with him in his little cabin in the forest, growing herbs and working at the ministry.

          Though you feel relief that it's over, your whole body is tense from the stressful week. You wonder how to release some of that tension, and whether now that you've graduated, perhaps Severus might finally be willing to make you c––

          "Come with me to the cottage tonight?"

          Your heart jumps at the interruption, excitement coursing through you as you glance up to his watchful gaze at the teacher's table. You fight against an obvious, enthusiastic smile threatening to spread across your face by looking down at your plate, UM OBVIOUSLY, YOU DON'T HAVE TO ASK ME TWICE, DADDY.  Your face flashes with horror and your cheeks burn red with embarrassment. I mean. Yes, that sounds nice. He smothers back a laugh, nearly coughing on his wine. He composes himself and smirks at you with amusement, trying to hide the growing grin on his face.

          You rest your forehead in your hand, propping yourself up on the table by your elbow, hiding your face from his. "My, my...so eager for me." You roll your eyes and cringe, Come on, Severus! You know I suck at filtering my thoughts...He smirks at you, "And I love your unfiltered, unadulterated thoughts."  His eyes darken as he brings some of them to mind and it makes your stomach fill with butterflies. You still feel embarrassed so you change the subject. Why are you taking me there tonight? "Why, to show you your surprise, of course..."

          Now you don't even try to restrain your smile as you look up at him. Though his mouth stays inexpressive, his eyes smile at you and he gives the subtlest nod, "Your excitement is very cute...I do hope you like it."  You think back to his riddle and your brow furrows in thought as you recall his words. He watches you a moment longer, his eyes gazing at you affectionately. "Meet me at our spot in an hour."

          You walk out past the rolling hills and watch the sunlight glimmering off the waves of rippling grass that covers them. The warm wind on your face makes you feel grateful to be alive and you smile softly to yourself as you think of how much your life has changed since last spring. You look ahead to see Snape standing by the sign waiting for you. He holds his hand out to yours as you approach, "Shall we?" You smile up at him and take his hand, falling into his apparation until you stand at the door of the cottage. His whole demeanor becomes eager and he smiles at you excitedly, almost as if he can only allow his truest, most alive self to fully emerge here in the solitude of the wilderness hemming in your new little home.

          You're almost overwhelmed by the sense of finally coming home, like the painful chapters of your life are behind you...like the life ahead of you is filled with promise and giddy expectation. It's as if any suffering it may throw at you now will be endurable and possibly even exhilarating, as long as he's by your side. Trials can become thrilling, pain can become strengthening, and loss can become room for growth. The hope you feel is electric in your veins.