Miracles don't exist || Theodore Nott

Chapter 16: Mother knows best

The DA meeting back from the winter holiday brings the first real smile to your face since Christmas. Everybody's buzzing with energy and ready to learn new spells.

At the point of practising the new defensive spell on your own, Hermione corners you. "Is it true?", she whispers, casting the defective charm on a target.

A hot flush shoots through your body. She couldn't possibly know about Theodore and you... right? "About what?" You try to keep it cool and cast another spell.

"About you and Harry... before Christmas?"

You feel your cheeks heating up and glance at Harry, who's at the other end of the room helping Neville. Hermione giggles and looks at you in glee. "How did it happen? Harry told us it was wet?"

Now your whole face is almost as hot as a fireplace. "We were discussing going home for Christmas and that I didn't want to go because..." You stop yourself just in time before you can reveal the location of Voldemort. "Because at home isn't the best atmosphere right now. And one thing led to the other and..." You trail off and twirl your wand in your hands, biting your bottom lip.

Hermione giggles again and clasps a hand over her mouth. "Did you enjoy it?"

"He's quite a good kisser, actually." The phantom feeling of Harry's warm hand slides from your cheek to your neck. Your hand reaches out and touches the spot. "What did he say about me?", you ask mildly panicked, the sudden realisation that Harry told something to Hermione — and possibly also Ron!

Your eyes flicker over the room and see Ron. But he's busy laughing with his brothers to notice you. So Ron knows too? You know you shouldn't care what the boy's opinion is about you. But it hurt when someone calls you a Death Eater while you try your darndest to be anything except what your family expects you to be.

"Well", she begins with a head twitch, "he did tell us it was 'wet', but he said it was nice." Hermione stops to assess your reaction. "Ron made fun of his terible snogging. But he has the emotional range of a teaspoon, so he shouldn't talk."

A smile makes its way onto your face. So he did think it was nice. Good. Great even. Despite everything, you thought it was nice too. And at least you know that you're not too bad of a kisser. But then a face flashes across your face. The same that made you break up the kiss.

"What's wrong?"

You're not sure if you can even tell Hermione. Sure, you're friendly to each other. But are you friends?

It's like she can sense your turmoil, she grabs your hand. "You can tell me anything." And she says it so sincerely, that you believe it.

You move to the side and wrap your arms around yourself. "I feel so guilty", you whisper. "I like Harry. And I liked the kiss. Really, I do. But..."

"Theodore Nott." Hermione gives you a sympathetic look.

You look with wide eyes towards her. "H-how?"

Hermione lays a comforting hand on your arm, her smile turning soft. "I see the way you look at him. With so much guilt in your eyes that it only means you care deeply for him. And he does the same when you're not looking. He has grown dull since the summer holiday. I don't know what happened between the two of you, but it's obviously hurting the both of you."

You blink at the wise words of the Gryffindor. Your eyes flick towards Harry. If it's so obvious, then why did Harry kiss you? Shouldn't he be shaming you for liking a Death Eater's son?

Like he knows what you're thinking, she says, "boys are as dense as the castle walls."

That makes you laugh. You turn back towards her and grab her hand. "Thank you, Hermione. For being a friend."