marauders one shots 🐺🐀🐾🦌

getting away with things 🐍🦁

this is not a ship or anything it's a simple interaction, there is no tension just straight up house rivalry
——————

"mmmmh... let me think"
"oh i got one!"
"go on"
"regulus arcturus black, or sirius orion black?"

you took an other shot

"you already know who i will chose"

your friend smirked

"ok. but tell us why!"
you laughed
"well. his style is immaculate, his words are charming, the way he acts and moves, his smirk, his wink, and don't get me started on his hair. regulus on the other hand... he's the opposite."

"well eloise i guess now we know why she prefers the older black brother."

"damn, after that lovesick speach i'll need an other shot."

you and your friends dedicated a night a week (saturday) where you would get lost in the forbidden forest and get completely drunk just to wake up the next morning and to have no clue where you guys were.

the fun was not only getting drunk, but also being hella hungover and try to go back to the castle.
some times you were woken up by rain;
other times by snow even.
once you all woke up to delilah screaming because an animal was eating her hair, she had to get a huge trim afterwards.

everyone at hagwarts thought that the four of you were crazy, many called you the female, younger (only of a year), slytherin version of the marauders- only crazier.

but when people said you were crazy, they didn't mean that you were crazy because
"oh my gosh they actually pranked a teacher! so crazy and quirky!"

when people called you crazy they meant it.
some say you should all be locked up in an institution.
some say that you shouldn't be allowed in school.

but you all didn't care, you had fun in your own twisted way.

"alright ara, your turn. evan rosier or remus lupin."

she just finished the drink she made herself.
"is there even competition? even rosier of course. i'm not the type for a gentle giant. i like them rough!"

"talking about rough..."
you all turned to delilah
"y/n, tell us what you think sirius black would be like in bed."
you looked at her for a second

"i'm sure he would have to be in control, because obviously, like a man child, his ego wouldn't allow otherwise. i bet he likes to pull hair, and his favorite position is reversed cowgirl.
because only god knows how many girls he brought in his dorm because of the body and not the face."

they all laughed in union at your remarks

"alright now. really important question. would you sleep with him?"

you smirked
"of course. but not without protection. i wouldn't want to get any infections or stds."

"i agree. plus. i bet he finishes in like 30 seconds."
added eloise

"like any guy!"
finished arabella

"hahaha alright, alright.
deli."
"me."
"yes. rate james potter under every aspect you can think of."

"aaaah. alright:
hair 6/10.
eyes 5/10.
face 8/10
body -come on girls let's be real- 10/10
hight 5/10- i don't like them too tall..."

the girls went on the whole night judging and cherry picking all the boys in the school.
what they didn't know is that four curtain boys were listening.
—————-

"why didn't you tell us!"
you looked at your friends with a frown of confusion.
"tell you what?"
arabella was the one that answered you in a whisper yell
"that you slept with sirius black!"
your confused frown still present
"no i didn't?"

you all looked at each other immediately understanding the situation
"that bitch!"
"hahahah! he really thought he could get away with this?"

and he didn't.

for the following days every time someone would ask you about you and sirius black you would answer with remarks such as
"oh, he's so small i could barely feel it"

"he brags about sleeping with so many girls, yet he can't even get the right entrance."

"i was so drunk i thought it was his friend!"

"he tells people they we slept together because i'm the best hes ever had."

sirius was furious that his plan didn't work out so as soon as he saw you in the hallway he ran to you
"why did you say all those things!?"

you turned around (you were talking to your friends)
"well i thought that the story you told was a little boring so i spiced it up"
he had a look of disbelief on his face.
you smirked waiting for an answer; realizing it wasn't going to come you continued to talk
"i don't know why you made those things up black. but just know that you will never get away with nothing if it involves any of us" you gestured to you and your friends.

sirius was furious that he started this but didn't get to end it.
"don't worry. i-"
you didn't allow him to finish "im not worried at all... you on the other hand should be."
you and your friends started walking away from sirius who stood there with disbelief on his face.
———-
hella shitty but wanted to post something (and i'm on a plane and have nothing to do)
honestly i started writing this around september and don't remember where i wanted this to go 😘)
stay high babes 🌸🌬️